Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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soft bra

- just gentle, no rough bits at all
 
(+10, -10)
  [vote for,
against]

1. take a sample of your own skin cells
2. grow skin in culture in large petri dish
3. when you have a largish sheet, cut to shape
from a template of your favourite bra
4. stitch together using catgut or whatever it is surgeons use nowadays.

you now possess the softest most natural bra possible.

future research continues regarding possible small decorations in the form of belly buttons or whatever.

po, Mar 22 2005

Will it surpass the new technology of this? http://www2.victori...9&cgnbr=OSBRPBBVBRA
[Machiavelli, Mar 22 2005]

(?) Not baked, but preheated here...... http://web.archive....com/issue1/jb1.html
[normzone, Mar 22 2005]

Skin bra? http://www.art.com/...EDAAF759700B8E5FA54
Raquel looks fairly comfortable in her low-tech implementation of this idea [zen_tom, Mar 22 2005]

And I thought *my* idea was weird... Self_20Leather
[DrCurry, Mar 24 2005]

[link]






       Sounds good [po] until it turns into leather...and then it sounds better.   

       Frankenboobs?
skinflaps, Mar 22 2005
  

       Errrr, po, are you ok?
salachair, Mar 22 2005
  

       Silence of the Mam's?
Muzzanator, Mar 22 2005
  

       Skin-on-skin contact would get hot and sweaty after awhile, becoming uncomfortable, and smelly.
Soterios, Mar 22 2005
  

       how would you know that?
po, Mar 22 2005
  

       Your closet would be a life support system. You hang the bra on the special hanger, which flushes out toxins and renews nutrients. Brings new meaning to "Living Bra".
normzone, Mar 22 2005
  

       po, I like you and all, but ew!
Machiavelli, Mar 22 2005
  

       use titanium underwires and just have it grafted on permanently
dentworth, Mar 22 2005
  

       Extrapolating from what we already have to put up with, [po], at least those of us with dangly bits. I imagine the talcum powder people would be all for this one.
Soterios, Mar 22 2005
  

       Which direction would you face the bloody side?
Worldgineer, Mar 22 2005
  

       I don't envisage a bloody side at all, just nice supple soft skin.
po, Mar 22 2005
  

       erg. thanks, world.
k_sra, Mar 22 2005
  

       " or whatever" ??!
Basepair, Mar 22 2005
  

       What if your skin is naturally bristly and calloused? It seems like it might be better to get skin from someone or something that is naturally soft and cuddly. Perhaps a harp seal pup?
bungston, Mar 22 2005
  

       You could get soft bra tattoos and piercings.
Soterios, Mar 22 2005
  

       The skin suit was mooted in 'Excession' by Iain.M.Banks:   

       "Genar-Hofoen was particularly pleased with his new suit. It was made of his own skin, genetically altered in various subtle ways, specially vat-grown and carefully tailored to his exact specifications. He'd donated a few skin cells to - and left the order and payment with - a gene-tailor here on Tier two and half years earlier when he was on his way to God'shole habitat. "
  

       A bra like that must be seriously comfortable though! (speaking as a man!)
gnomethang, Mar 22 2005
  

       Put nipples on it and you've got my bun.
brodie, Mar 22 2005
  

       speaking as a woman - there is no material as soft as my skin.   

       as per decs - I did think of nipples but thought they would be a distraction to masculine thinking.
po, Mar 22 2005
  

       You are probably right on the distraction front, [po].
gnomethang, Mar 22 2005
  

       <this skin has a wobble factor of 10>
po, Mar 22 2005
  

       <sighing a great big happy long stretched out sigh>
zeno, Mar 22 2005
  

       Or whatever?   

       So is this dead,.. alive or dying? Fish if it is dying, bun if it is dead. Your a freek if it is alive...
shad, Mar 23 2005
  

       //there is no material as soft as my skin//   

       How's about moleskin?
wagster, Mar 23 2005
  

       Kid skin (the goat kind, obv.)?
squeak, Mar 23 2005
  

       easier growing my own skin than skinning something else!?   

       is there a soft skin index somewhere?
po, Mar 23 2005
  

       I think you'll find it *much* easier to skin something else. Whether or not you find it repulsive is another matter.
wagster, Mar 23 2005
  

       my skin is the softest.   

       I just want my own - not some odd mole or other...
po, Mar 23 2005
  

       I have a couple of moles on my shoulder, some on my arms, one on the middle knuckle of my middle finger...if anyone wants them to make soft bras with, they're more than welcome to them. But I'm warning you, they're small.
Machiavelli, Mar 23 2005
  

       And, given a few million years of evolution, they'd become sentient.
hippo, Mar 24 2005
  

       //this could lead to individually prehensile breasts// <shudders to imagine what Madonna might make of this>
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Mar 24 2005
  

       //given a few million years of evolution, they'd become sentient.//
Then women’ll run into the same problem that men have—do you think with your head, or your other sentient body part?
brodie, Mar 24 2005
  

       //given a few million years of evolution, they'd become sentient.//   

       Finally we'd be looking at who we're talking to.
scubadooper, Mar 24 2005
  

       I knew we'd run abreast of this idea sooner or later.
normzone, Mar 24 2005
  

       //this could lead to individually prehensile breasts// - not cooperatively prehensile breasts then? A lucky escape.
hippo, Mar 24 2005
  

       explain yourself, hippo! either option seems quite dangerous.
po, Mar 24 2005
  

       people are missing the point here.
zeno, Mar 25 2005
  

       [brodie] this //Put nipples on it and you've got my bun.// is very disturbing to me...
Ichthus, Mar 25 2005
  

       why not stretch babies foreskins removed during circumcision?
benfrost, Mar 25 2005
  

       I'm going to be boring and logical.   

       If your regular skin, though I have to believe it is wonderfully soft and luscious, cannot support your breasts in the manner you desire (else why would you be wearing a bra in the first place?), how would a separate bra made out of it suffice?   

       Now, if you were to *line* a fully supportive bra with your own skin, *that* would make sense.   

       Has my vote anyway, as long as I can help fit it.
DrCurry, Mar 25 2005
  

       never boring but today a tad illogical. a layer of anything, no matter how soft or slim, will give a degree of support. it would probably not suit any particularly well-endowed woman, though.
po, Mar 25 2005
  

       You'd just need to increase the thickness or number of layers.
Worldgineer, Mar 25 2005
  

       you people are sick.
willywilliams, Mar 26 2005
  

       So, um, what are you doing here then?
DrCurry, Mar 26 2005
  

       Maybe [willywilliams] has(bursts into song) come to take us away "ha-ha"
skinflaps, Mar 26 2005
  

       In one way, ew.   

       But on the other hand, oooh.   

       I just don't know. First of all, if human skin offered that much support, then we wouldn't need bras. Also, it's a little bit disgusting and it would get sweaty (well, the bra itself wouldn't, because presumably it wouldn't have sweat glands). Thirdly, how the hell would one go about keeping it clean? Take it into the bath? Give it a shower? I don't want my own skin floating around in the bath with me if it's not attached to my body! And finally, wouldn't the skin just die? I don't think skin is self-sustaining.   

       I want to like the idea. I truly do.
bookends, May 07 2006
  
      
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