h a l f b a k e r yA riddle wrapped in a mystery inside a rich, flaky crust
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In the interest of preserving endangered creatures' I have the solution thet will warm are bodys and the hearts of all you animal lovers out there. It's called REAL FUR. I mean REALLY REAL FUR. Instead of killind thost hairry creatures, Ie: Mink/fox/ermine ,etc etc,why not just adopt the 'critters'.
With the addition of stratigicly attached velcro strips sewn on to man made linings, and attaching live beavers or sables together in a formation (not unlike sardines in a tin) to create a living breathing luxourious garment that will make your neighbors green with envy. And since the critters with the proper care and feed, will grow,you can grow right along with your coat. Or, If you care to 'mix and match', you can use combinations of species. The local ASPCA's would gladly help you in that respect. Aword of caution: If your chappeaux is of feathery design, (Robins/Blubirds etc, try using other than any feline varieties
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Annotation:
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I suspect the local ASPCA might not be able to provide you with mink, fox or ermine. |
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The animals should be trained or bred to attach themselves naturally, as the cat does to the best draperies. Just walk into the Real Fur Coat Shop, and all the creatures will try you on for size. |
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Can I still club baby seals? |
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The last thing I want fear getting rabies from is my coat. |
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baked in just about every classic Warner Brothers cartoon. |
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Real mink are better off dead.
They aren't much fun alive. |
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Great! Now I have a scarf that I
have to trap when I want to use it. |
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[thumbwax] - now you can go clubbing with baby seals, albeit as part of your attire. |
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"Whiskey, on the rocks. No ice. And a coke for my coat..." |
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bluto - Health: hygiene?
Fashion: nose, animals? |
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Bartender "What'll ya have?"
Seal "Anything but a Canadian Club." |
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Why does this remember me of the really creepy scene in Ghostbusters? You know, the one with the fur coat that springs to life. |
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okkkkkkk now i'm spooked. why would i want a coat that would bite my head off? and what about the animals? how will they feel about being a coat for the rest of their lives? what if they want to be a regular animal and run through the forest, sleep under the moonlight, splash in the mud?! |
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Just stick to protecting animals the old fashioned way. Or a way that doesn't involve us making them coats. I absolutely adore all animals, and i would hate to see one as a coat - dead or alive. |
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