h a l f b a k e r yProfessional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.
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Sloths are fairly shaggy animals with greenish fur due to the algae which grow on them. Presumably, if they were shorn, it'd grow back again. Unlike sheep, however, they generally just hang around in trees and are easier to catch and shear - in fact, maybe they could even be shorn in situ. Additionally,
they also have nutritional value.
My idea is therefore that a new line of knitwear be created which is to be worn in wet weather, made from sloth hair. It would also have nutritional value because if you got peckish you could just suck or lick it. It could even be made into towels. Besides, it would also be naturally green and wouldn't need to be dyed that colour.
[link]
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Perfect for a lazy afternoon in the sofa. |
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"EAT ME" thought the sloth. |
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They don't always live far up in trees. I'm not suggesting this is done in the Amazon, but in a pollarded plantation. I've seen sloths very close to the ground. And the joy of this idea is that no dogs need be involved. They move really slowly: they're not going to run away. |
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Domestic sheep can actually get so wooly that, if they fall down, they can't get back up again. That makes them pretty easy to catch, but you still have to get them to the sheering station. |
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What could possibly be worse than getting an ill fitting jumper knitted by some half blind, half mad distant relative at christmas time?
Getting an ill fitting mouldy jumper knitted by some half blind, half mad distant relative at christmas time |
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Ah, but this one has algae as well as mould and has to be kept damp. It'd probably be quite slimy. That would appeal to some sections of the populace. |
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// removing a large arboreal creature like the sloth from its tree // |
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They could be sheared "in situ" |
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Yes, that's what i was thinking, maybe by a stealthy arboreal robot. |
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"Sloth Fur" would be a line of clothing. They would be soft
and lazy. They might or might not be made of real sloth fur.
It is too good of a name to waste if it turns out sloth fur is
yucky. |
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The croissant i gave you is mainly for suggesting that
humans suck on sweaters made of sloth hair for
nutritional value. The thought of doing that or
encountering someone else doing that was a very
delightful thought. |
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Thanks. [Joolin], at some point on here there was an
idea, which may have been mine, to live in a swamp,
be very shaggy, and survive by sucking the stuff
growing on your hair. |
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