h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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parrot shrink
Lonely parrots and depressed humans -- the perfect daytime match. | |
Highly social parrots (and other psittacids), when kept as
pets,
tend to show symptoms of loneliness when deprived of even
their owner's companionship, e.g. during the latter's
workday.
This has led to efforts to set up websites and chat rooms for
latchkey parrots, but such projects are
still in the r&d
phase.
In the meantime, why not put your frustrated chatty pet to
work, letting it get some daytime companionship AND earn
its
keep at the same time?! Set up a secure ante-room in your
home, with a coin-operated door; patrons can enter for 45
min. to an hour (per the local market), get comfy on a
couch,
and explore their problems and psyches with an
appreciative
birdbrained shrink at bargain rates. The parrot, while
mauling
a rawhide cigar, will interject insightful phrases like 'Tell
me
about your mother!', 'And that makes you feel how?', 'I think
we're making real progress here' and 'I'm afraid our time is
up
for today.' Both parties will feel warmer/fuzzier, and the
parrot will feel more fulfilled in life overall. A win-win.
Stoicism Parrot
http://www.halfbake...a/Stoicism_20Parrot by pottedstu. A personal favourite. [my face your, Oct 05 2004]
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Annotation:
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Using animals to make people feel better is a well established practice. Not sure that having them parrot psychiatrists phrases is going to add any special benefit. |
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The parrot's name? Eliza, of course. |
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I'm not going to pay good money for this. I'm gonna buy a budgie. |
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BRAWK! Excuse me - *poot* *splat* (folds/unfolds newspaper liner) - Ready for Rorschach Test? BRAWK! |
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Perhaps breed a breed of miniature stoicism parrots (by genetic engineering jiggery pokery, or just get a Shetland pony to mate with a parrot) for to stand on the shoulder of your unhappy parrot and for to make him/her feel better. |
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Unhappy miniature parrots can be dealt with by the same means, resulting in a sort of fractal psychiaparrot system, peeling away into tinyness, on the left shoulder of every housebound pet parrot in existence. |
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Have you any idea how those twitchy tails turn a Kat on? |
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I thought this was about pirates forgetting to take their parrot off their shoulder before sticking their jackets in the washing machine, for a hot wash. Oh well. |
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Like the Paxil and Rorschach comments. One advantage to parrot shrinks that I forgot to mention: it'd be quite easy to, um, spot a quack. |
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+ for the Rorschach comment from the late great and really late [thumbwax] |
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