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cumoflage underoos
Make those unwanted stains dissapear...or at least make them really hard to see | |
Ok. So I used to be a fan of the whitey tightys(i think i was last man standing on that one) but my penchant for blowing my load in my sleep has lead to expirements with other colours of underwear. Obviously off white hides the stains best, but who wants to walk around in underwear that look like
they were washed in HARD watah? Thats where my cumoflage underoos come into play. That's right. A distinguished camoflage inspired mishmash of undeterminable white and off white shapes. I'm thinking cloud patterns would work well. I don't know why I'm putting this on halfbakery, i needs to be selling this shit to Hanes! Or fruit of the loom. but only if they give me one of those giant fruit suits.
Alors
http://en.wiktionar...une_carte_de_France This must happen a lot in France [DenholmRicshaw, Feb 27 2010]
[link]
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Reminds me of the joke about the ship's captain who called for his first mate to bring him his red shirt when being attacked by pirates, and his brown pants when being attacked by the Spanish Armada. |
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I'm guessing the male who models these underwear, if they are ever produced, will be surprised to learn that some men ejaculate in their sleep. |
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Make it a map of France - see link |
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Try cracking one off every now & again, that should
solve your problem at the source. |
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Okay, but you'll never fool Mom. |
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Come on over here, I'll give you your Fruit Suit, you
poor tormented soul, |
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But Wait; Hmmm..., now there's an idea,! A real fruit
suit. For real. People could come and pluck their
favorite fruit off your suit. Ching Ching. |
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Wife beater T's do not suffer the above described problem, but it is hard to get them the correct mottled beige unless you have access to hard watah. The proposed scheme would be useful there as well. |
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Good god - this is disgusting, [poor now]. You sleep in your
underwear? That is gross. |
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/who wants to walk around in underwear/ cum-
stained or otherwise |
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This idea could be extended to bed sheets as well. |
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//cum stains get you more lonely nights wishing you were getting laid// |
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Heed these words [poor now], for they are cuming from a man that knows! |
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The camoflage pattern could blend to a different darker pattern in
the rear for a true bone & bun solution. |
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//Make those unwanted stains dissapear...or at least make them really hard to see//
So changing into a clean pair isn't an option then? |
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Since they're stains, they, by definition, are still there after
laundering. |
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Tighty whitey's serve a purpose, keeping things from flopping around during sports and whatnot.
I didn't think anyone on the planet would tolerate sleeping in them. There's your first problem. |
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Strictly boxer-briefs. Grey, because they can be washed in either the dark or light loads. And strictly one type of Calvin Klein's, because they have more length to the waistband, which is useful at times. I swear most men's underwear must be designed for either <insert petite racial stereotype here> or Spongebob. |
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