h a l f b a k e r ynon-lame halfbakery tagline
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a vest made from bacon rashers in a pleasing design of alternate streaky and back bacon. stitched with bacon rind and seasoned to taste. perfect for the chef at the nudists’ colony barbie.
every splash and splat of boiling oil and fat will cook the vest to perfection. never again will the cook be
left with nothing to eat.
(???) Baked! (or is it fried?)
http://user.tninet.se/~rcp650a/cover5.htm
Album cover from The Undertones' 'All Wrapped Up'. [DrBob, Dec 03 2004]
(?) pork/goose grease for colds.
http://www.missabig...n/selection127.html
a nudist with a cold could only benefit from the application of pork grease... [po, Dec 03 2004]
Bacon Vest illustration
http://picasaweb.go...5091503332426641522
back again. [dentworth, Jul 26 2007]
[DrBob]'s link re-established
http://www.pergunna...ges/undertonesB.jpg
[normzone, Jul 28 2007]
The chef will also be wearing these, I presume...
Steak_20Trousers
[theleopard, Jul 30 2007]
(?) Lady Gaga
http://www.google.c...4AgSJ_blBcXte83bC6Q
[po, Sep 15 2010]
[link]
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F@**!n frying hell!...Yek!, Urrrggghhh! and Urrrggghhh! again! |
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po, I've told you before to log off when you've finnished, so that the kids can't use your account when your not around. Yek! |
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Are you back to [skinflaps]? |
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[po] Add a sausage casing for the male chef. |
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[FJ] Yep, and covered in rashers! |
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A new take on 'who wants to lick the spoon': 'Who wants to lick the bacon grease off.... the chef's naked body?' |
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& a dinky little onion rings pocket just in case. |
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Every purchase gets you a voucher for one session of hand relief from Rebecca Loos. Oink! Oink! Ssskkkkkwwwwweeeee!!! |
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[Po] I'm shocked! You've never made me go 'Eeew' before. |
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F@**!n frying hell!...Yek!, Urrrggghhh! and Urrrggghhh! again! |
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Well - This certainly would be a must-have for the accident prone nude chef on your holiday list this year. I know everyone has knows someone like that. |
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//never again will the cook be left with nothing to eat.//
Thats right - nor will the bacteria living on the underside. |
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nudist chefs like to shed the garment between courses and its quite likely that the garment is turned around each time like roasting on a spit. |
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I have a favorite fantasy about a nude chef, a well sculpted back side, broad shoulders, a neck I want to nibble on, pacing confidently about the kitchen in nothing but an apron....but jeez...... didya hafta go and make him smell like bacon grease! |
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well, probably a faint whiff of Armani, most of which is lingering on his neck, (drool....) |
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not someone we know then... |
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well now that he smells like bacon, his whole image has just fried up, up in smoke. just a sizzling memory. |
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They only ever found his left shin bone. |
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I *used* to like bacon. Now I don't think I'll ever be able to cook a batch without thinking about trying it on. <shudder> |
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surely the smell of fried bacon is one of *the* most glorious smells of all time. |
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It is [po]. Could you fax me some please? |
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RT says its possible - ok. |
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Everytime I see this, I think of the Visible Human Project, which to me just looks like Parma ham. Mmmm, Parma ham. |
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crickey, dent, that smacks something awfuk of S & M. |
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I dunno [po], it looks like a sketch of Alan Shearer hosting a barbecue.
([AWOL] denies all links with Newcastle United football team, and has never seen Alan Shearer at any social gathering)
BTW [po] I like the way you worked "smack" and "S&M" into the same sentence. |
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Er, um, all the splats and splashes of oil will not cook the bacon to perfection and if it did, the (semi)nude chef would be horribly burned. But you are a crazy one, [po], yes you are, and if a naked man scantily-clad in cooked meat will make you happy then by all means you shall have one. |
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AWL, it kinda comes natural! |
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k_sra, get back to you on that. lovely to see you back - I'm sure I'm not alone on that. |
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<flutter of eyelids> Thanks, po. </foe> |
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first I considered making his vest a little (lot) longer and covering his 'tender vittles', but then I decided to just make his tool a little bigger instead. good enuff? |
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his? who you got in mind? little tool? did I miss something? |
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I meant the illustration. shucks now the joke is dead. |
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I had to delete the illustration, I will try to reapply, po. |
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this still makes me laugh! |
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I think I must add this to my top 10! |
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Am eminently sensible idea. Maybe the dragons might be interested... |
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Sorry: an enimently sensible idea. |
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"Did you burn your elf when you were cooking?" |
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"Oh that, no, it's just a rasher" |
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My wife's family tells of ancestors who would flee attackers in eastern Europe and wear "bacon vests" in order to more efficiently carry the racks, or something. They really called them "bacon vests." |
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Which one of you is Lady GaGa - c'mon, 'fess up! |
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