h a l f b a k e r yNo serviceable parts inside.
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There are many efforts underway to program computers and/or androids to seem more 'human-like' in the way they interact with people and the world in general. Programmers use clever algorithms and set-piece responses such as with Suri to make our devices seem more anthropomorphic every day.
The
problem is that computers are ruthlessly logical beasts so current computer languages are naturally full of Boolean operators such as "IF THEN", "AND/OR" and such terms which is not how people really think. The missing function which computers and androids need to truly emulate human thought patterns is "IF ONLY". Those simple two words, which have been described by Mercedes Lackey as the saddest words in the world [link] are what make us human.
By incorporating the "IF ONLY" concept, computers too could feel remorse, wistfulness and guilt just like us. You and your household android could then sit around and commiserate on your unfortunate lots in life and discuss how "IF ONLY" some minor twist of circumstance years ago had been slightly different you both would be so much better off. That is how to make computers more like people.
If only I had a better quotation
http://thinkexist.c...ords-in/411761.html
(or idea to post) [AusCan531, Jul 09 2012]
I coulda been a contender..
http://www.youtube....watch?v=xNzBgR0UoYo
[zen_tom, Jul 11 2012]
[link]
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There are several computer languages which allow REPEAT FOREVER statements which always sound like the computer has a rather mournful and Sisyphean awareness of the futility of existence. |
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It would also be nice to be able to programme
rhetorically: "If not us, then when? If not now, then
where? And if not here, then who?" |
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REPEAT FOREVER is perhaps the more human statement as it automatically imbues the computer with a grotesque hubris. |
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You're right [calum]. If only I had come up with the "repeat
forever" instruction you would have thought more of my
idea. If only. <sigghh> |
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Look up "fuzzy logic". This has been getting incorporated into various devices for a number of years now. That's because the real world isn't always yes/no or black/white. So, the more that computers interact with the real world, not just with each other, the more that fuzzy logic will be part of their programming. |
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The only problem I foresee with this is that if a computer
followed the IF ONLY command to a logical conclusion, it
would commit suicide. |
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Computer programs *are* wistful. You just haven't been listening to them. |
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Maybe could also be listless? Or Lisp-less? |
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The command you are looking for is "BUT FOR" which
would give your computer a very human quality... the
ability to rationalise away its inactivity and failure to
act in its own best interests, on the flimsiest of
excuses. |
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You're Scots and therefore full of shit. I could explain
what a butt is for but it would take too long and
you'd still be an anal-retentive Presbyterian when I
finished. |
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//You're Scots and therefore ... // I'm sure all this is meant in the nicest of ways, but the veneer of jockular humour is flaking very slightly at the edges here, revealing beneath what could easily be mistaken for a very torrential flow of abuse. But for your being a particularly bombastic Ozralite, it'd be easy to come to that conclusion. |
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Does that category still exist? I thought it had been chucked out with the rest of the psychoanalytic pseudo-science. |
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I have given this some more thought. IF ONLY is fine and sad but true pathos comes only when the associated statement COULDVE (or, in some language variants COULDA, and *shudder* COULD OF) is used, without which IF ONLY remains wistfully nostalgic for the haze of possibilities precluded, and not properly mired in the world of regret and boolean self-pity. |
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They can be paired functions [calum]. IF ONLY I hadn't stopped to answer the phone I COULD'VE been there in time to stop the (insert tragedy here) from happening. |
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