h a l f b a k e r yCogito, ergo sumthin'
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It's a little-known fact that the first American whisky
bottles were indeed hammer-shaped. Most experts agree
that this was a traditional shape carried forward from the
Scottish practice of aging whiskey with an iron hammer in
every barrel. A minority faction contends that the shape
was inspired by the Irish practice of aging whiskey inside
specially-crafted hollow hammers with stoppers in the
handle, but their arguments are unsupported by any
evidence whatsoever that this practice even existed. Either
way, all agree that the early hammer-shaped bottles gave
birth to the modern slang term 'getting hammered',
meaning consumption of alcholic beverages to the point of
extreme intoxication. |
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The modern bottle-shaped bottles with which we are
familiar today are the result of an industry-wide attempt
to reduce the vessels' utility as impromptu weapons.
Predictably, this ill-concieved act of altruism was a
complete failure. |
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Actually, the reason that design was a //complete
failure// is that the bottles *didn't* suffer complete
failure when banged sharply against the bar. If
they'd been manufactured like Prince Rupert drops,
they would have been useless as weapons. Extreme
tempering would probably also be the way to make a
Whisky Hammer. |
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//specially crafted hollow hammers// were old rusty heavy sledgehammers with hollowed out handles and heads. The advantage was a very fast flavour take up due to the increased internal surface area of both fire-treated wood and iron. |
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The result was a robust crudely flavoured whisky which still retained most of the distillation esthers which would be lost in a long aging process, packing quite a punch (and quite a hangover). |
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Of course the same result could have had by simply dropping wooden dowels and iron shot into a regular small barrel but the "decrepit farm implements" had the advantage of being inconspicuous to the wife, nosy neighbours and local constabulary. |
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There is some evidence that the first glass hammers were a commercial venture in cut-rate products: the shape indicated to those in the know that the whisky had been artificially aged and was thus more crude and potent. |
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Thus the phrase "getting hammered" used to refer to the unenviable results of drinking cheap whisky. |
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I thought it said "This is my dram". |
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I thought it said both. At the same time. Like a drunkard
woulda seddit, yyyouknowhut... knowhuttamean, man? |
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I assume we're talking short-handled, chunky lump hammer, square cross section, with chamfered edges. I'm not normally a sucker for gimmicks, but I'd buy that. |
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