h a l f b a k e r yI like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.
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(1) Break an abandoned wasp nest from its place under your eaves.
(2) Use an exacto knife to carve out a slot big enough for a key.
(3) Insert spare key.
(4) Glue, or otherwise affix, the nest in a realistic, but out of the way new location -- make sure that the key slot is facing the
house and not visible from a normal standing perspective.
Optionally: (5) To increase appearance of being a "live" wasp nest, find a dead wasp (or create one by putting a live wasp in your freezer), and then inconspicuously pin it to the exterior of the nest.
* Note: a better idea is to not lose your keys.
Fake Wasp Nest & Wasp Repellent
http://www.waspinator.co.uk/
Note that it is designed to fool wasps not humans. [Aristotle, Mar 20 2010]
[link]
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*Note: An even betterer idea is to use real, live wasps! |
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I'd rather have a realistic plastic decoy that makes occasional buzzing noises, infused with wasp repellent (lest the real wasps get any ideas) |
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Alternatively, transplant a real wasp nest to the front of your house and use on of the ultrasonic wasp repellent thingies to enable hiding and retrieval of your key. |
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Just don't lose the ultrasonic thingie. |
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New idea: wolverine's den hide-an-ultrasonic -wasp-repellent -thingie |
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This is quite clever and I like it. +, but i think selling
plastic stick up ones, to put your key in, would be a
more lucrative idea. |
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your neighbors will hate you for having a visible bastion of infestation attached to your house. they may come with a stick late at night or a can of wasp-be-gone. |
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// a can of wasp-be-gone // |
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"wasp-be-gone", pronounced "napalm". |
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Perhaps the key should only be accessible from inside the house? |
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What if new wasps move in? Does that happen? |
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No, because the key is inside the nest, so they can't open the door. |
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A related gadget [see link] that might inform the
discussion by its very existence. |
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[21_Quest]\\This would work great if someone saw you reach
for it and remove the key, and you then surreptitiously
replaced it with a real wasps nest.\\ |
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To address [21Q]'s concerns, your Wasp Nest Hide-a-Key can easily be retrofitted with an electrification device. A current running through a wire in the nest gives any would-be burglar a mild ZAP, simulating the sting of a wasp. If you need to access the key yourself, simply step on the off switch, disguised as an ant hill on the ground. |
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What if the ant hill is taken over by real ants ? |
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There is a backup switch in the bottom of a fishpond full of clockwork pirhana fish |
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What is some jerk *shifty eyes* puts real piranha’s into the pond? |
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In that case there may be a convenient accident involving the neighbor's cat that creates a diversion long enough to flick the swich. |
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Depends what the cow's wearing, and how attractive it is. |
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The thing is to keep the piranhas well-fed to stop them eating so quickly, so there should maybe be a paddock full of capybaras out the back. |
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Real capybaras, or fake ones ? |
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