Victimization Insurance

Being mugged sucks. I can't back that up with personal experience, but I can hardly imagine that it'd be that enjoyable an experience, other than just the opportunity to meet new and interesting people who might pistol-whip you for fun.

But the worst part of it is the financial burden - loss of cash, valuables, and other sundry belongings, all of which must generally be replaced.

And so I present to you: Victimization Insurance (not to be confused with crime insurance, which covers businesses against fraud, theft, and ransoms). Pay a small monthly fee (say, 15 bucks a month, a similar amount to renter's insurance) and a small annual deductible (say, 50 dollars), and the insurance company will cover you against losses incurred in robberies, thefts, and, of course, kidnappings.

In order to protect the business, you'll have to present a police report number with your claim.

In order to do nothing but turn a profit, this will be offered to all people, but marketing will be targeted primarily at suburbanites. Let's face it, upper-middle-class white people are deathly afraid of being robbed, and watch too many movies and episodes of CSI - the perfect demographic for this business.

Coverage would be issued in 1-year, 5-year, and lifetime packages. Payment up front accepted.

It should be noted that this will not apply to pure financial losses, as cash is impossible to prove/disprove without a bank receipt, and financial institutions universally cover illegal use of a credit/debit card post-theft.