h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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Blacker is the new black, and new navy blue...
Make like a hole in the water, or air, or space, for
that matter.
[link]
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Excellent. If this were implemented, the navy would finally be able to conduct covert operations in coal mines. |
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Unfortunately, because it is SO black, it's blacker than anything else (for example, the stuff around and behind), and therefore not camouflage. It would be incredibly easy to spot, even at night. |
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I think it belongs in science: light |
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Or Product:Prank:Acme:Wyle E. Coyote Stick-On Tunnel Portal ... |
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Ok apparently I need to spell it out a bit further. |
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Excellent radar absorption. |
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... but still, I imagine, bleeding obvious to sonar? |
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Maybe you could combine it with noise-cancelling technology ... |
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But no; what [shadow] said: what you want is to look as dark as
your background, and no darker. |
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Also, I suppose, might work better in the sky, at night. |
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Never mind the navy; Vantablack is the ideal stealth technology
for the Space Force. That's the environment in which you want to
be the same colour as Nothing. Might also bring on Kessler
syndrome a little earlier, because no-one would see it coming. |
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"It's like, how much more black could this be? and
the answer is none. None more black..." |
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Well, there's at least two possible (marked-for-tagline) examples here: |
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" Ok apparently I need to spell it out a bit further " |
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During WWII, the French airforce developed a very effective strategy to make their aircraft undetectable - they simply weren't there. |
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Maybe adding the water-borne contingency was a bit rash. |
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A well-crafted deception can often be more effective than the thing it's simulating. This is well known to the military. |
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This is workable but first needs a little prep. Whilst
painting your war vehicles in Vanta black and crafting vanta
black cloaks for your soldiers one must release trillions of
aphids or other honeydew producing insects over your
intended field of operation. If that isn't practical have your
airforce spray the area with a similar sticky, sugary
solution. |
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As any gardener will tell you, all vegetation and other
substance covered in this inexpensive substance will soon
be covered in sooty mould. The airforce or partisans will
have ensured that plenty of the appropriate fungal spores
have been wafted around. In no time at all your invading
vanta black forces can waltz into the area undetected
whilst the defending army, clad in green, will be obvious
targets. |
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The trouble with this idea is that only Anish Kapoor is
allowed to do it. |
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I understand that's only true of art. So long as it can't be defined as art, Kapoor can't lawfully stop you. I don't know what definition of art m'learned friends would use in this case (perhaps [calum] could advise?) but I can think of one possible angle; posit that art, nowadays, is defined as anything that serves no definite purpose. Point out that your work serves a quite definite purpose, namely, to frustrate Anish Kapoor, and that therefore it's not art, so Kapoor can't stop it. |
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// art, nowadays, is defined as anything that serves no definite purpose // |
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We always suspected that Jeremy Corbyn was some sort of artist ... |
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To a nihilist or existentialist then, everything is art. |
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... and I'm pretty sure a Situationist from the 60s would have said
exactly that. Probably more than once. |
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Fire safety issues. Think about it: you'd be dialling down the
frequency to the lower limit of visibility (to make it as red as
possible), and then you'd have to up the amplitude somehow to
make sure it was still visible. I'm thinking painted-on burning
coals. |
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// I wonder what would be involved in patenting a super
redder-than-red? // |
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There's a "pinkest pink" paint available, which anyone is
allowed to buy, except Anish Kapoor. |
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