h a l f b a k e r yTrying to contain nuts.
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Each and every damn time I hop on a bus I always seem to end up sitting within smelling distance of the foulest most unhygienic person in the world. Some might argue that this experience adds to a rich tapestry of life.. Not me- my bus will have gently wafting air from the doorway over an array of smell
sensors in the doorframe.
It will detect the following:
BO,
Piss,
Shit,
Excess alcohol,
Fags (just put out fifteen seconds ago),
Two day old curries,
Really cheesy feet,
Fear,
Greasy lank hair-combined with the above.
I know these sensors exist. They just need applying and connecting to an indicator that warns the driver (or a bus AI that the driver can blame).
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Er my girlfriend says the public transport system is in a bad enough state at the moment without depriving bus companies of their main source of income. So I`ll fishbone myself… |
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Lordy help 'em in their quest to get enough dough to retain an attorney to sue for discrimination. Though there IS a loophole in signage "Right to refuse service to anyone who smells like refuse" and I recall nothing along the lines of "...regardless of race, religion, creed, colo(u)r, stench...". |
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andrewuk... um, sorry. I'll try to sit somewhere else if I see you get on. |
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What about people who wear excessive amounts of
perfume? |
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I'd rather sit next to someone who hasn't showered in a
week. At least that smell won't stick to me for the rest of
the day. |
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I have the same problem in class. And I can't kick out my students. |
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This is a great idea. Those gin-sodden bums don't pay bus fare anyway, and they keep many other would-be fare paying riders away. |
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They could simply attach a spray can of air freshener to the ceiling. Anyone who needs it can take it down, spray around them, and put it back up. No comments are necessary. |
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Everyone smells different so what is bad for some is not so bad for others. Just douse everyone in the same scent so noone can complain |
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And this is your third idea? I'll be patient. |
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