Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Underwater Cigarettes

Enjoy the beauty of cigarette smoking - under water!
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Sometimes, when deep sea diving, one would love to be able to light up and enjoy a cigarette. This is difficult at present due to the cigarette extinguishing nature of water. My idea involves the creation of special underwater cigarettes that would stay lit until completely smoked. You would need a glass tube filled with oxygen in which the cigarette would be placed. The glass tube would be fitted with a special filter system. When the smoker takes a drag the smoke passes through the filter, which would stop water flowing in to the glass tube and then through a tube connected directly to the smokers lungs. The tube would be fitted before the dive.
ccaamgw, Jul 06 2000

Some Diving Club http://members.aol....815/25thReunion.htm
Apparantly NASA prohibit smoking dope underwater [hippo, Jul 06 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Herman the Merman and his underwater smoke. http://www.dazeofourlives.com/000315.htm
No, really. Well, sort of. [StarChaser, Jul 06 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]

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       A couple of simpler approaches:   

       -1- Mix sodium chlorate or other similar compound with the tobacco, to serve as an oxidizing agent. If enough NaClO3 were mixed in, as well as some chemicals to avoid making the thing burn too fast, the cigarette might be able to provide oxygen for the smoker to breathe as well [wouldn't that be an interesting Bond-movie item!?]   

       -2- Include a bong in the diver's air supply system, with some possibly-non-fire-based heater. This would give the smoker all the nasty chemicals without needing to use up oxygen.   

       -3- Buy some Nicorette.
supercat, Jul 07 2000
  

       Go on - Put that lit cigarette in that glass tube filled with oxygen. I dare you...   

       BOOM!!!   

       Surely it would be easier to just smoke heavily near the compressor's air intake when you're filling up your tank? You'd then get a lovely mellow smoke which would last the entire length of your dive.
hippo, Jul 07 2000
  

       Oxygen is combustible but not violently explosive! I think Hippo has been watching JAWS over and over agian. Oxygen will keep it lit but it would have to be a tube that is continuously being filled with the gas because oxygen carbonizes very rapidly.....
RobEC, Jul 22 2000
  

       A cigarette burning in a 100% oxygen atmosphere *is* pretty exciting. Whether or not you call it "violently explosive" is really a matter of interpretation, but I'm pretty sure it would burn too fast for even the most hardcore smoker.   

       But I'm not sure if ccaamgw meant pure oxygen. What do divers breathe?
egnor, Jul 22 2000
  

       I was thinking of the same mixture that the diver breathes. Couldn't the glass tube with cigarette be fitted inbetween the tank and the bit that the diver bites on to?
ccaamgw, Jul 24 2000
  

       Oxygen is *combustible* ?!? I think I must have been missing something in chemistry lessons...
Lemon, Jul 24 2000
  

       Why hasn't anyone mentioned the ashtray?
Alcin, Aug 21 2000
  

       Offtopic: Oxygen is not "combustible", but a pure oxygen atmosphere does make things burn around 5 times faster (because there's 5 times as much oxygen as normal for them to react against; a "normal" atmosphere is 20% oxygen).   

       I don't think divers breathe pure oxygen, so that's a moot point.
egnor, Aug 21 2000
  

       What about pressurized beer bottles for the total subaquatic party experience - you could shake a bottle and stick it down your snorkel, but then you'd choke on the foam. maybe just a rubber cap with a slit apperture that you could bite down on... Hmmm, maybe sold with an application for the Darwin awards.
Scott_D, Aug 21 2000
  

       Surely there's some apparatus to allow divers to drink (water, or electrolyte "sports drink")? Otherwise it seems they would be in danger of dehydrating on a long dive.
egnor, Aug 22 2000
  

       Divers don't breathe pure oxygen- just compressed air, sometimes with helium added for deep dives to minimize 'the bends'. Pure oxygen will actually induce unconsciousness after a short period of time (case in point: hyperventilation).   

       Also, any type of drink with carbonation is a very bad idea on a dive. If you were to drink something at 4 or 5 atmospheres pressure and then moved to one atmosphere, the gas would then expand to 4 or 5 times its previous volume. This is why a diver can take a full breath at two atmospheres, ascend to one atmosphere while constantly exhaling, and still have a full breath of air in his or her lungs at one atmosphere. It's also why my dive instructor advised me to breathe out constantly when ascending- if you don't, your lungs will rupture.   

       At best, drinking carbonated bevys while diving would result in a colossal belch when you surfaced; at worst, your stomach would explode.
BigThor, Aug 26 2000
  

       If fish want to smoke, let them. It's not up to us to decide!
ccaamgw, Aug 26 2000
  

       If God didn't want fish to smoke, he wouldn't have made deep sea divers with special smoking equipment!
lockle, Aug 26 2000
  

       Why dont we make waterprof snack foods such as twinkies that would also serve as lifepreservers, I'm sure at some point they would come in handy.
Dreaming _Knight, Sep 07 2000
  

       Anyone thought about the concept of fish having major problems passin cigarette butts? "CHOKE-EM-BUTT" Seems it would be very painful.....;o)
ABE, Sep 11 2000
  

       fantastic, now my cigarettes wont go out in the shower!
monty, Sep 17 2000
  

       Go for the underwater party theme here.....   

       Beer & Cocktail bottles....but how would you handle?   

       - Lines of coke - underwater dj'ing
Phurge, Dec 02 2000
  

       now smokin' dope underwater....that'd be fun!
tabman, Aug 08 2001
  

       IIm pretty sure the olympic torch is waterproof to a certain extent, so this is dfinetly possible.
Seafris, Mar 18 2003
  

       You've heard of smoked kippers...
Freelancer, Mar 19 2003
  
      
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