Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Un-Awareness Ribbon

ribbonoclast attire
  (+23, -3)(+23, -3)(+23, -3)
(+23, -3)
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Celebrate your apathy or satire the ribbon craze with this reflective black and yellow hazard striped ribbon. Wear it on your sleeve to indicate you're not aware, and reduce the traffic danger of being so.

I've seen so many ribbons. Yellow ribbons, red ribbons, pink ribbons, all worn on one's shirt to indicate that, yes, one is aware of some problem. "Hello world, I'm aware of the possible problem of ELE's from killer asteroids! Hooray!"

We who think this is silly need our own ribbon. A ribbon to celebrate ignorance, obliviousness, apathy, and the folly of doing something that may feel good but doesn't directly help anyone.

Any ribbons that are in fact useful may be acquired in extra-small form and pinned onto the anti-ribbon ribbon.

joeforker, Jul 25 2005

(?) I support... http://www.tshirthe...t.php?productid=487
[fridge duck, Jul 25 2005]

red ribbons http://www.redribbon.com/
[po, Jul 25 2005]

clear ribbons http://pics.livejou...vortex/pic/0000tpwk
the clear ribbon is a very similar concept. I like this one better, tho'. [Acme, Jul 26 2005]

Tie a yellow ribbon http://www.supersev.../1973_1singles.html
[Ling, Jul 27 2005]

Ribbon colours http://www.answers....hl=orange&hl=ribbon
Hmm, I see what you mean [Ling, Jul 27 2005]

Custom Vinyl or Magnetic Ribbons http://www.mesavist...ustomYellowRibbons/
No wonder there's such a problem, with this outfit churning out custom ribbons. [krelnik, Jul 28 2005]

antimagnet.com http://antimagnet.com/
Per El Dorado's suggestion, already baked [krelnik, Jul 28 2005]

Joe and Monkey Wears an Armband http://joeandmonkey...Rows_Recordset2=335
armbands in the comics [joeforker, Aug 19 2005]

PvPonline Wears an Armband http://pvponline.co...p3?archive=20050813
more armbands in comics [joeforker, Aug 19 2005]

[link]






       Ribbons? Have people been wearing ribbons?
wagster, Jul 25 2005
  

       Invent also 'Awareness Ribbon', symbol of the movement that promotes awareness. Think fast! is the motto of Awareness Week.   

       Participants take part in festivals dodging foam cars, falling foam bricks and pianos, foam pickpocketers etc. to practice important real-life awareness skills.
joeforker, Jul 25 2005
  

       Can we have unawareness/total apathy wrist-bands too please? [+]
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 25 2005
  

       Yes but only if you have a special wristband to promote the awareness of your unawareness/total apathy movement.
hippo, Jul 25 2005
  

       ”When did you become aware of the plight of zoo visitors who stand too close to cages?”
”Only after I was cut to ribbons.”
FarmerJohn, Jul 25 2005
  

       I think it would be best if it were invisable, and instead you just walked around looking totally apathetic, and lethargic all the time. +
blissmiss, Jul 25 2005
  

       Sorry AbsintheWithoutLeave, I'm afraid I wasn't paying attention to the counterfeit charity armband that people buy instead of the one that actually sends money to a cause, those plastic bands with recessed letters. I rate them as also silly, but not as insidious as the ribbon.
joeforker, Jul 25 2005
  

       //I rate them as also silly, but not as insidious as the ribbon.// You don't have teenage children, I'm guessing.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 25 2005
  

       Who does not want to wear the ribbon? Who?!
ldischler, Jul 25 2005
  

       Let the pink ones stay, but make fun of all the rest.
moPuddin, Jul 25 2005
  

       Won't the act of wearing an "unawareness ribbon" in effect, imply awareness? I appreciate and agree with the sentiment underlying this concept, but unfortunately, the only truly pure means of expressing obliviousness is to just be oblivious. To wear a badge of obliviousness or unawareness indicates that you are, in fact, aware. More accurately, I think the desire is to develop a "Don't Give a Shit" ribbon.
JoeBobbJR, Jul 25 2005
  

       Perhaps you’re aware at first, but eventually you forget. And when you see your ribbon in a mirror, you stop worrying about things, because you remember then what you'd forgotten: that you could care less.
ldischler, Jul 25 2005
  

       I think the red ribbon was first (please tell me if I am wrong) and I wear mine with pride.
po, Jul 25 2005
  

       The problem with all these ribbons and bracelets is that I have to remember the code for your ribbons. So I don't know if you're promoting breast cancer awareness or the mass slaughter of household pets.
Noexit, Jul 25 2005
  

       nah. I think it only matters to the wearer...   

       anyone going through life unaffected by any coloured ribbon should count themselves lucky or perhaps an alien life-form.
po, Jul 25 2005
  

       [Noexit] - I doubt the Association for the Mass Slaughter of Household Pets would make their intentions fully clear to the world - or else they'd be shut down...   

       Kidding.
froglet, Jul 25 2005
  

       As a bumper sticker, this is widely baked in the U.S. in the form of 50 stars and 13 stripes.
Laimak, Jul 25 2005
  

       Soon, they'll be a fashion requirement, like ties.   

       Alternative: the Oblivious ribbon. "The wearer of this ribbon is oblivious to most things. He/she/it does not even realize they are currently wearing it." Would help to avoid those types that just take up oxygen.
RayfordSteele, Jul 26 2005
  

       I think the wristband you are looking for [Absinthe] is also known as a wide rubber band.
Ichthus, Jul 26 2005
  

       I hear that the first ribbon campaign used fig leaves.   

       Some of you have more or less pointed out that this idea is not sure whether it wants to be a. a Ribbon of Oblivion or b. Satire the Uselessness of Ribbons (by fighting ribbon with ribbon). It is mostly b. This ribbon is for smug people who like to feel more enlighted than other people by snubbing their confusing ribbons, not for people who have trouble remembering to tie their shoes and accidentally wear unmatched socks.
joeforker, Jul 26 2005
  

       The AIDS campaign was not only fighting for money and resources for research etc but fighting a stigma; ribbon-wearing was as much about that issue as anything.
po, Jul 26 2005
  

       //I think the red ribbon was first (please tell me if I am wrong) and I wear mine with pride// OK [po], you're wrong - a yellow ribbon was first (Tony Orlando and Dawn, c.1973) or possibly even earlier - John Wayne, c. 1949.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 26 2005
  

       what was that for? convicts coming home?
po, Jul 26 2005
  

       [po] Yeah but you had to be a superannuated Quercus to wear one.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 26 2005
  

       heh. "He wears his blindfold on his sleeve."
reensure, Jul 26 2005
  

       pfft. Whatever.
lintkeeper2, Jul 26 2005
  

       OK, lemme find the link...aw shit [fridge duck] got it.
Eugene, Jul 26 2005
  

       Don't know why, but this reminds me of chanting...   

       "No more chanting! No more chanting! No more chanting!"...
Giblet, Jul 26 2005
  

       I'm afraid I found it hilarious that the kids wearing the blue "Anti-Bullying" wristbands were being beaten up for them in school, owing to their rarity.

As for the "Make Poverty History" lot, I have quietly renamed them "Make Rubber Bands Profitable".
DocBrown, Jul 27 2005
  

       I can see the "Knowingly post-modern ironic ribbon" being a big seller.
hippo, Jul 27 2005
  

       "No I'm not aware of Alzheimer's Disease, Domestic Violence, or Children with Disabilities! This ribbon is NOT purple! It's perrywinkle! Get it right! I'm aware of Pulmonary Hypertension and Eating Disorders. Learn your ribbons!"   

       Give me a break.
JuJuHound, Jul 27 2005
  

       "Do you mean 'periwinkle'? - Here, have this chartreuse 'I Can't Spell' ribbon"
hippo, Jul 27 2005
  

       no relation to huckleberry then...   

       what a weird gmail address btw.
po, Jul 27 2005
  

       Thanks [po] for pointing out my disregard to spelling. Yes - periwinkle, not that I'm ashamed to say that I didn't know how to spell that.   

       //what a weird gmail address btw// What about it? (Whiskey Rock-A Roller is a Lynyrd Skynyrd song, and yes I intentionally misspelled 'whisky')
JuJuHound, Jul 27 2005
  

       spelling, who mentioned spelling?   

       this is turning into an un-awareness thread.
po, Jul 28 2005
  

       You can get them at antimagnet.com (see link): "I support the guy in China who makes these idiotic magnets"
krelnik, Jul 28 2005
  

       Another vote for apathy (+).
neilp, Jul 28 2005
  

       What if they actually were patches that you stick on your body (perhaps your forehead), and they had chemicals that REALLY made you unaware of things, it could also come with a bumper sticker to make other people aware of your situation.
kangarux, Jul 29 2005
  

       Fu**itol 100 mg/day intradermal patch. I think I know how these would be shaped, but the color ... ?
reensure, Jul 30 2005
  

       I am now completely unaware that there is an underground movement of aliens... Joking!
froglet, Jul 30 2005
  

       AbsintheWithoutLeave, It's been 3 long years, do you still want me? (want me)
moPuddin, Jul 31 2005
  

       yellow don't suit you mo.
po, Jul 31 2005
  

       Ah, after many re-reads and confused chin scratches, I only just now realized that it was [Hippo] who criticized my spelling. My apologies [po]. No relation to huckleberry. I'm sorry.
JuJuHound, Jul 31 2005
  

       sp: criticized, [JuJuHound]. Heh.
jurist, Jul 31 2005
  

       //=//=//=//=//
zigness, Aug 02 2005
  

       Does this ribbon count towards your required 32 pieces of flair?
sophocles, Aug 04 2005
  

       or how about a 'make make poverty history history' wristband ?
bumhat, Aug 05 2005
  

       I recommend a "Support our Ribbon Manufacturers" ribbon, in money green.
elhigh, Aug 08 2005
  

       I think the "I just want to be trendy" ribbons are selling the most. The owners of Trends-R-Us are most pleased with this new line. ;)
babyhawk, Aug 20 2005
  
      
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