Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Turing abadan nuclear plants into ighthouses

 
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How about turing abandoned nuclear plants into lighthouses, they are mostly situated near the sea anyway. And there's a computer in there somewhere. And it's on an island in the delta of the Shatt al Arab.

Wouldn't even need to use lightbulbs, just equip ships with Geiger counters and/or recognition charts for "if the herring have more than three tentacles, maybe slow down".<refrains from the Chernobyl chicken joke, but only just>.

My psychic skills suggests that someone is going to the do the "hard of herring" pun.

not_morrison_rm, Sep 05 2016

South pointing Chinese chariot http://www.lhup.edu...ointingcarriage.htm
[not_morrison_rm, Sep 05 2016]

[link]






       // equip ships with Geiger counters //   

       OK ...   

       Alphas go a few dozen millimeters in air. Betas are stopped by a sheet of paper. Gammas have the wherewithal to go a fair distance- but how do you collimate them ? X-ray and gamma "lenses" exist, but they're large, inefficient, and very heavy. If it's not collimated, inverse-square law will quickly cut the detectable intensity, and how do you discriminate that from the cosmic ray background or the Captain's luminous watch ?
8th of 7, Sep 05 2016
  

       Next up, turning house plants into light nuclear reactors...
RayfordSteele, Sep 05 2016
  

       //Alphas go a few dozen millimeters in air. Betas are stopped by a sheet of paper. Gammas have the wherewithal to go a fair distance- but how do you collimate them   

       Get one of them ancient Chinese South-pointing chariot thingies, but with paddle wheels instead. Or just have the detector on a very long stick, supported by balloons at regular intervals.
not_morrison_rm, Sep 05 2016
  

       ^ "And there's a computer in there somewhere."
not_morrison_rm, Sep 06 2016
  

       //abadan nuclear plants// It's actually about 37km northeast of Abadan; it's called the Darkhovin (or Esteghlal) Nuclear Power Plant.
lurch, Sep 06 2016
  

       Presumably the next iteration will be "Turing azerbaijan noclear planks into ighthoses"
8th of 7, Sep 06 2016
  

       I was thinking more Turing Abadan nuclear plants into Whitehouse(s).
not_morrison_rm, Sep 06 2016
  
      
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