Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Train Kindergarten

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Set aside one carriage on off-peak trains (i.e. not the rush-hour ones) as a kindergarten. If you're a normal passenger on the train but you also have the requisite criminal records checks etc., and you want to travel for free, just volunteer to work in the kindergarten carriage for your journey. If you're a parent and need some childcare for your child, just put him/her on a train kindergarten for the day. Obviously the logistics of this will need to be organised so that all the children make a return journey in the time they're being looked after by this service (e.g. London -> Edinburgh -> London).

Everyone wins - train companies use excess capacity, parents get affordable childcare, passengers who want to work in the kindergarten get free travel, and small children get exciting train journeys (all children love trains) and get to see the country.
hippo, Aug 05 2014

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       yes if there's anyone I want in charge of caring for my little bundle of mayhem it's unvetted strangers who want to travel free.
Voice, Aug 06 2014
  

       They're probably the safest option by far.   

       The likelyhood of a random stranger harming a child unknown to them is vanishingly small.   

       This excludes individuals who are intentionally seeking children, of course. But if you want to protect children from harm, warn them against (1) their parents, (2) their siblings and other immediate family in the household, and (3) family friends and more distant relatives.   

       The vast majority of children who are harmed or abused are well- known to the perpetrator.   

       As for the idea, it could be vastly improved by offering (for a modest premium) single rather than return tickets. We understand that Caithness and Wick can be quite pleasant in this season.
8th of 7, Aug 06 2014
  

       You forgot (4) living in Arkansas
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 06 2014
  

       ...or indeed Norfolk. (A Norfolk virgin: an ugly 10- year old who can run faster than her brother.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 06 2014
  

       // living in Arkansas //   

       Tautology: it is not possible to live in Arkansas.   

       It IS possible to exist in Arkansas, but if you want to live, you have to go somewhere else (Little Rock AFB, dear God what an awful place, never again) <wanders away, shaking head and mumbling, in search of strong drink>
8th of 7, Aug 06 2014
  

       //if you want to protect children from harm, warn them against (1) their parents, (2) their siblings and other immediate family in the household, and (3) family friends and more distant relatives.//   

       Indeed, any establishment...
harsh that.
  
      
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