h a l f b a k e r yI CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?
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I noticed a while back that the threads on
woodscrews can be pretty
wicked. They're razor sharp, and provide a lot of
cutting surface if used
a certain way.
This is a baton about the same diameter as a D-Cell
powered Mag-Lite.
It is approximately 18-24 inches long, depending on
your
preferences.
It's the same diameter along its whole length, and
threaded along its
whole length, except for the handle, which is a
separate piece.
Intended more as a weapon of intimidation than
anything else, it is
designed to instill fear in its victims. Not only are
the threads razor
sharp, it is inserted in and removed from its tubular
scabbard much
like a power screwdriver. The handle is filled with
batteries and has a
two-position thumb switch. To sheath or draw the
weapon, it is
operated exactly like a power screwdriver. Hold the
handle firmly,
press the button, and the baton threads in or out,
making a terrifying
whirring noise. The lubricated scabbard is designed
so that it sharpens
the threads with every removal.
For use in combat, there a variety of uses. You can
swing it
unpowered, or thrust it with the power on if you
have the tapered
version. Brutal and effective as a weapon, you may
want to make sure
you have some cover fire while drawing this
weapon, as it may take a
while (Hence the subtitle). And pray it doesn't
become cross-threaded
in the scabbard.
The Geneva Conventions
http://en.wikipedia...i/Geneva_Convention
Four treaties and three additional protocols [8th of 7, Jan 06 2010]
[link]
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Will it make an interesting "BZZSSSSSSSSHHHHHH..... WHUM ...... WHUM ......." noise ?
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And thus although only a boy, Robert's son Phillip twisted Helixcalibur from the stone to be dubbed from that day forth as...Aurthur! |
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Wow, this would be a particularly brutal weapon. (+)
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Ahhh, to invent something that may have to be mentioned in the
Geneva Convention amendment. (+) |
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// the Geneva Convention //
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Actually, there is more than one Geneva Convention.
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Wouldn't the spinning cause a gyroscopic effect,
making it difficult to wield?
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An undeniably odd weapon, though. |
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It would undoubtedly take some skill and a lot of getting used to,
but with the reverse switch it can be made to spin either way. |
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Made by Makita? Sounds like something the motorcycle cops in Iran would use. |
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Better yet - make it telescopic so that, when the button is
pressed, the short flashlight-sized device unscrews itself and
extends. |
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Actually, I was thinking Craftsman or DeWalt. But Makita works, too. And Max, the telescoping bit could work very well with a simple ballscrew assembly. The problem you'd run into there, however, is where exactly it retracts to. The handle is full of batteries, remember. |
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//The handle is full of batteries, remember//
What, you mean you haven't invented annular batteries yet? |
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// The handle is full of batteries //
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<Obligatory Dave Bowman Quote>
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"My God ! It's full of ...... batteries !"
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</Obligatory Dave Bowman Quote>
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Actually, it should be "cells", which are the individual elements. A battery is two or more cells in an enclosure.
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"I'll have pack of triple-A, please" |
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// I was thinking Craftsman or DeWalt. But Makita works, too//
Craftsman is usually black, Dewalt is yellow and Makita is blue. I think yellow is better, but black is interesting. Depends on the effect you are looking for. Yellow is best for deterrent.
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Also could I get mine as a tonfa, as I think that would handle the torque better. I'm a little worried that I'd try to drill someone and twist my wrist. Also the arrangement could put the on off switch at the easy of find position at the end of the short handle. |
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well If you screw someone you either have to let go of the scewsaber or you have to immediately unscrew them otherwise you have to share the same immediate space with a wounded adversary who is still functional enough to wail on you. Terrifying? Yes. Lethal? Yes. Defensive? No. It would be even more uber if it had a "head" on it that caused ripping after the auguring was complete. |
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//where exactly it retracts to. The handle is full of
batteries,//
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Imagine a conventional flashlight (but without the bulb).
Now put a slightly larger cylinder around it, threaded on
the outside. Now take a yet larger cylinder, threaded on
both the inside and outside, and screw it onto the first
one. Then a larger one yet, and screw it onto the second,
etc. So you have a series of concentric cylinders, similar
to a telescope but threaded, with the batteries in the
middle.
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Now imagine there's a stop on each thread, so each
cylinder can "unscrew", but can't completely unscrew from
the one inside it. If you now rotate the outermost
cylinder relative to the innermost one, the whole
assembly will unscrew and extend.
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How to achieve the necessary rotation? OK, first, put a
"cap" on the front end of the outermost (largest) cylinder.
Now take a retractable car arial, but with a square section
(so the sections of the arial can't rotate relative to one
another). Weld the top of that arial to the inside centre
of the "cap". Put a motor in front of the batteries, and
connect its shaft to the base of the "arial". Now, when the
motor turns, it will turn the "cap", thereby turning the
outermost cylinder, thereby extending the device.
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There is a snag with this, but it is easily corrected and I
will leave it as an excercise for the reader. |
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