h a l f b a k e r yThe Out-of-Focus Group.
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We've all said it: I feel like I need a shower. Perhaps that
sleazy boss of yours just gave you a wink. Or maybe you
read a NY Times Editorial where a dictator is lecturing your
President on exceptionalism.
Whatever the need for immediate cleansing, now there's
an app for that. Simply
select that icon, and your
smartphone will bathe you in soothing light while emitting
powerful ultrasound that separates dirt particles from your
body without doing any damage.
Using it as a bar of soap, you quickly pass it over all the
relevant parts of your face and body, and feel clean as a
whistle.
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Annotation:
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*Shortens phone battery life remarkably. |
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As a phone app it's definitely destined to remain
halfbaked. But it might be a good idea for a device in its
own right. One that is about the size of a mobile, with a
UV light screen that kills microbes, and has an ultrasonic
feature to do what you describe - if its not bad science -
and perhaps also vibrates or exxudes some sort of
cleansing agent, whiles scraping with a razor. $599.99 at
your gadget store. |
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What's this talk about the science being good or not. Since the dirtiness this is designed to work against is not physical dirtiness, why would it matter if the app actually removes physical dirt or kills microbes. The placebo effect is well documented science, and I believe it is especially applicable to non-physical conditions. |
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Battery life could be improved by playing back the ultrasonic noise at a fairly low volume. If possible, the light could be turned on at a low intensity "soothing" level, just bright enough that you can see that it is on. Note the "powerful ultrasound" is powerful compared to the background level of ultrasound and also powerful in the sense of the psychological effect in removing non-physical dirt. It is not necessarily powerful compared to the sound output of your normal ringtone. |
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The talk about science is in regards to designing a device
that physically does what the app does psychologically --
obviously for the placebo to work it has to be based on
some sort of science, why else? |
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This might be a successful app, the trick is condensing
the concept into a short saleable novelty idea,
ultrasonic sterlizer, bar o'soap, etc. Something that
captures the whole idea of feeling dirty and using the
phone as a waay of communicating that feeling
outwardly through the action of rubbing - perhaps to the
sound of falling water, scrubbing and bubbles popping. |
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