h a l f b a k e r yOn the one hand, true. On the other hand, bollocks.
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When a gust of wind grabs your hat, you dont stand a chance. The hat lifts off before your hand is halfway up, and then you look silly chasing it down the street as it bounces and rolls like an acrobatic rabbit. Instead, get a sacrificial hat, and your bare-headed, windy days are over.
Available
in models ranging from Panama to fedora to baseball cap, the clever chapeau works by shedding its thin outer layer to remain on the brain. The outer hats satin lining allows it to depart in high winds, leaving a narrow-brimmed cap hugging the skull. The two are joined by a cord that serves three purposes.
The cord keeps the outer hat from disappearing among tires, shoes and dog teeth. The cord is attached to the inside crown of the retreating part, causing it to turn inside out to diminish air drag. Most importantly, the other end of the cord is interlaced through the inner hats sweatband, so the pull on the cord causes it to grip the cranium like the drawstring of a purse.
Then merely reel in your flapping headgear half, reunite it with its mate and press on through the cruel elements with covered head held high.
picture of hat in action
http://www.geocitie....html?1076151739625 [FarmerJohn, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Another kind of flying hat
http://www.amazon.c...82-0498342?v=glance [theircompetitor, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Sacramental Flying Hat
http://tvmusic.topc...ics/2flying_nun.jpg Sally Field put her head gear to a higher purpose. [jurist, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
[link]
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Ah, le chapeau sacrificatoire! |
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is the inner hat glued onto your head? |
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Excuse me madam, but your rottweiller seems to have run off with one half of my sacrificial hat. I wouldn't have troubled you, only my scalp is beginning to tingle in an alarming fashion. |
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[po] Rather it gently garrotes your scalp. |
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The Sacrificial Limb: For the savage tribes with a sense of proportionality. |
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Wait, I think I'm in the wrong thread |
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So, it's a decoy that fools the wind in to thinking that it has already blown your hat off so it will then go away and bother someone else? |
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The wind is not so easily fooled! The inner hat must look like natural hair. |
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Sailors and dutch people also like the wind. |
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But seriously, couldn't you change the aerodynamic properties of the hat to give it a boomerang-like returning flight path? |
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The utility is obvious, but I'm unconvinced that the inner hat has the compression power to remain on your head. I suggest a nylon-strap halter worn under the clothes to which a more ordinary hat is attached by a lanyard. (Confession: I just wanted to use the word "lanyard.") |
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[po] Not mine, you can't. |
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is there a fetish involving seeing the word lanyard in print? |
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CD - "owns a penis"? can you rent one? |
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kropotkin -- thanks for reminding me of one of my favorite movies -- see link |
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//can you rent one?//
Don't forget to rewind it. |
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