h a l f b a k e r yI like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.
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The Pit and the Pendulum (for those who don't know) is a dastardly tale by Edgar Allan Poe, which features a device of particular terror to those who become its victims.
Its operation consists of the motion of a curved blade on the end of a swinging pendulum, whose continuous progress backwards and
forwards is also accompanied by a relentless gradual descent towards the neck of its intended victim.
The Pit and the Pendulum Egg Timer is a scale model replica of its infamous namesake, complete with twitching victim.
A simple dial sets the time of descent of the blade, calibrated from one minute to a full hour. When the blade reaches the neck of its victim (think barbie-doll sized figure) a blood curdling scream is released, chosen at random from a prerecorded selection. This grows in intensity the longer it is ignored.
With the figure removed, and another simple modification, The Pit and the Pendulum Egg Timer can also be used to automatically dice carrots, celery, tomatoes and other vegetables.
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Better for the device to be full size, and the user to lie beneath it? Your egg is ready when you feel the first brush of the blade. |
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Would it not be possible to arrange for the blade to "decapitate" the egg at the exact moment of perfect cookedness, thus fulfilling two necessary functions ? |
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Simple modification got my vote. (Sorry, Edgar) |
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//relentless gradual descent towards the neck of its intended victim// |
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It has been a while since I read any Poe, but I am sure the blade was positioned above the victim's midsection. Not the victim's neck. |
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