h a l f b a k e r yClearly this is a metaphor for something.
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Ladies, ever felt frustrated by wandering eyes which linger over your breasts for TOO long?
This Bra, with an inbuilt (yet discreet) sensor picks up whether eyes have been staring at your breasts.
After a set interval (say 5-10 seconds), the Bra shoots out (via nipple mounted lasers) a laser
beam directly into the ogler's eyes. Thus blinding them for a few minutes.
This could be useful in meetings, giving speeches, first dates, in singles bars etc etc ......
[link]
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I would hope that peering through big lenses, such as binoculars or telescopes, would defeat the mechanism (if it's actually a device, and not just magic). Heh. |
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So 10 seconds is the time limit. I've been underestimating... |
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//Ladies, ever felt frustrated by wandering eyes which linger over your breasts for TOO long?// - this suggests that you would like wandering eyes to linger over your breasts for at least some time. I suggest you wear a t-shirt explaining the time period you would prefer to have your breasts ogled. |
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So, technically, a shirt reading:
"If you're still staring after reading this, rest assured it will be your last time."
would be a pretty good indicator, right? |
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...or <rambling> hide the t-shirt message in one of those crappy "magic eye" stereoscopic pictures that were so popular about 5 years ago - "If you can read this message you've been ogling my breasts for too long"...</rambling> |
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or "oh, now you've really gone and done it... by my stereo-optical calculations you've been looking at my tits for 7 minutes 43 seconds. You now either have to pay a £300 fine or date me."
Sometimes the fine may be cheaper than taking the girl out a couple of times. |
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"Oh! Hey! A Stereogram! Let's see... Uhh, If...You...Can......Read.....OW! MY EYES HAVE BEEN BURNED OUT BY LASERS THAT SHOT OUT FROM YOUR BREASTS FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON! I HAVE TOP SECRET NAVY CLEARANCE WITH THE FBI ON MY SCOOTER! BEWARE MR. FORWARDED!" |
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afro, it's late. Go to bed. It will all be better in the morning. A group of nice quiet guys in black suits and shades will pick you up and take you out for breakfast. |
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No, I can see that having small lasers mounted in a nippular location on your chest is going to stop men staring. "Hey, has it suddenly gotten cold in - ZZZZAP!" |
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snarfyguy: be careful...lasers + optical equipment = focused lasers. |
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Someone hand me a LART for [larch]. |
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reading this bewildered boy's ramblings is like watching a road accident |
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"Look, laser rifle jigglies!"
Next, we can have "laser panties" to punish those gents who prefer a nice ass? (Of course, the punishment will be emitted from an obvious location.) |
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In older women, there would be a risk of shooting yourself in the foot <DUCK! Incoming!> |
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Snarfy guy, if those things picked
up with your binoculars you wold
probly burn holes through the
back of your head! |
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It's always amazed me that people and animals can tell where someone is looking. Think about it - the only visual cue you have is the position of a little black disk in a little white disk. At a few hundred meters, these look like very small disks, yet we can usually tell somewhat accurately what someone's eyes are pointing. |
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Not to get too nit-picky, but how would this device know where someone's looking? (though it is unclear whether [Purge] is still here to answer me) |
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Hmmm. Would definitely deliver a social power shift in favour of women as the male half of the population gradually blind themselves. |
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