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Cadbury's Cream Eggs have already began appearing in time for Easter. (actually they showed up weeks ago) These used to be a tradition with myself and my work colleagues, but since Cadburys was bought over by Kraft, we no longer buy anything they produce. (it's all far too sweet now, in keeping with
the taste and ethos of their vile new parent company)
This leaves a vacancy in our craving for cream eggs, and with this in mind, The Creepy Cream Egg is born. This version of its famous, but now sadly rotten original, has one main surprise in store for those who venture to bite through the thick outer shell of chocolate covering and into the mushy interior. Inside The Creepy Cream Egg is a partly formed chicken foetus, occupying half of the yolk material. It is of course totally composed of brittle chocolate, but in a convincing manner, in order to provide some al dente crunching resistance when being eaten.
Some individuals will want to take their time and suck away the remaining yolk material to reveal the form of the chocolate chick, before munching it down. We make no comments on this type of behaviour.
Other detailed chocolate egg foetal contents are under development.
Different to, but about as creepy as this
White_20Chocolate_2...d_20Cherry_20Center [hippo, Mar 17 2017]
http://www.telegrap...hanging-recipe.html
cheap and nasty muck as befitting their new colony owners [xenzag, Mar 17 2017]
Brix
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brix Sugar measurements [8th of 7, Mar 18 2017]
The Chocolate Garden
https://www.tripadv...ounty_Michigan.html You have no idea how incredible they were... [RayfordSteele, Oct 31 2021]
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Annotation:
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Tiny brittle toffee bones, crunchy skull ... [+] |
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The strange thing is that Cadbury's Creme Eggs are not, as far as I know, a Thing in the USA. So, it's strange that Kraft has tried to make them sweet and bland in alignment with US preferences. Perhaps their next move will be to replace the crinkled blue-and-red foil with flow wrapping. |
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It should be a dinosaur egg, with mini chocolate
dinosaur skeleton, to encourage an interest in
paleontology |
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Yes - and actually, a chocolate dinosaur egg
containing a crunchy chocolate velociraptor skeleton
should be a real product - people would buy it. |
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" Other detailed chocolate egg foetal contents are under development." |
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We are pleased to hear that. |
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Is there any prospect of a Brontosaurs-sized* chocolate egg, maybe with a mint filling ? We realise that this may offend traditionalists, but we urge them to give it a try before criticising. |
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*A chocolate egg the size of an adult Brontosaurs, not a fiddling little egg that a Brontosaurs would lay. |
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//Kraft has tried to make them sweet and bland in alignment with US preferences// |
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It's not preference so much as a higher tolerance for corporate fuckery. |
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Ah, would that be the so-called "Clinton Effect" ... ? |
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//It's not preference so much as a higher tolerance for corporate fuckery.// |
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Actually, I think it is a preference, and it's an interesting one. Almost everything in the US tends to be sweetened to a remarkable degree. Even the bread is sweet, which is just weird, at least to a European palate - it doesn't taste of bread. Likewise any condiment from mustard to pickle is predominantly coloured, thickened sugar, with varied amounts of salt and acidity. |
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In the case of chocolate, I can see that it's more profitable to sell a sweetened vegetable fat with less cocoa, than a chocolate bar itself. But in the case of things like bread, it is surely just a matter of local preference? |
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It's curious, because America is famously a melting pot, so it's hard to see that there can be a genetic difference to account for the differences in taste. I'd be interested to know when it happened. |
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... filled to the brim with HFCS. |
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Sweetened pickles are anathema. |
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//Sweetened pickles are anathema.// Really? In my wife's case it's pollen, but she carries an inhalator. |
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Foods became mega corporations here first. Add that to
the simplistic dishes we adopted for matter of pioneering
and ease of travel across wide open lands, and the more
fussy sorts of cuisines and spices had to be left behind. |
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// The strange thing is that Cadbury's Creme Eggs are
not, as far as I know, a Thing in the USA. So, it's strange
that Kraft has tried to make them sweet and bland in
alignment with US preferences. Perhaps their next move
will be to replace the crinkled blue-and-red foil with flow
wrapping. // |
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Cadbury Creme Eggs have been a thing as long as I can
remember in the Pacific Northwest region of the USA.
I've never had one that wasn't sickeningly sweet. I think I
ate one a year or two ago and it seemed unchanged, but
I'm not a Cadbury expert. |
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I did eat one recently (out of experimental curiosity) and I
actually felt ill afterwards. If there is an index of
sweetness, they must surely be standing on its extreme
peak. |
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// If there is an index of sweetness // |
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Ahhh, I have a bit of bleeding bone stuck in my teeth. Nice.
Extreme sweetness is, of course, in the rare food group. |
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A series of licks could be used to excavate the entombed
entity which might be a lot of messy fun. |
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I always wondered what the original link of eggs to Easter
was, and how it connected with Pessah the biblical
Passover. Just to make things worse, Passover is actually
a different holiday according to the bible, a day earlier,
on the 14th of the "first month in spring-time, when a
sheep is slaughtered and eaten wrapped in soft Matzah
bread and bitter herbs, in a family gathering at
the Seder evening, the "meal of order". The next seven
days are called "Hag HaMatzoth" - the 7 day holiday of
Matzah. But today, both are considered one Passover
holiday. |
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Eating an egg is traditionally done by mourners after the
burial of their loved ones, signifying the "roundness" of
life cycles, |
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On the Seder night we eat an egg - traditionally replacing
the meat sacrifice that cannot be offered with no
temple, and at the same time signifying our grievances,
to the ruined temple to the loss of sovereignty over the
land of Israel, and to the state of exile that the Jewish
people were in for many years. The eating of the egg is
similar to mourning. |
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The "last meal" according to the descriptions in the "new
testament" was exactly that: A Seder night. |
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But in Jewish tradition, the term "Last meal" is a used for
the meal before Yom Kippur fast day, the day of
otonement in the winter, and before the Tisha-B'Av fast
day in memory of the ruined temple, during summertime.
In the latter, there is a custom to eat an egg with ashes
on it. |
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There is a strong connection between the two times:
Passover night and Tisha b'Av night, each is traditionally
mentioned in the other's prayers and religious practice. |
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Lastly, since bread is forbidden during the 7 days of
Passover, eating eggs was a common practice. Today, its
mayonnaise, egg salad, tuna and avocado on the Matza. |
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Could it be the origin of the Easter egg tradition? I'm sure
historians (with no clue) differ with me on that. To see
the answer open Easter Island on google maps Hit Help
About while pressing the Shift button, and you may see
something, don't ask me what. |
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I always imagined Easter eggs as being as relevant to Easter as Christmas trees are to Christmas, ie: not much if at all; probably something coopted from an existing practice before Christianity stumbled through, or even a commercial construct. |
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But your theory gives some context : after over a month of partial fasting, the "Easter Egg Hunt" could be just to finish off the uneaten ones. |
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Before refrigeration there seems to have been much interfaith choreography concerning market/storage/preparation of foodstuffs vis-a-vis food-related religious customs. |
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Interesting. From the wiki page; |
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"legend says that Mary Magdalene was bringing cooked eggs to share with the other women at the tomb of Jesus, and the eggs in her basket miraculously turned bright red when she saw the risen Christ. |
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A different, but not necessarily conflicting legend concerns Mary Magdalene's efforts to spread the Gospel. According to this tradition, after the Ascension of Jesus, Mary went to the Emperor of Rome and greeted him with "Christ has risen," whereupon he pointed to an egg on his table and stated, "Christ has no more risen than that egg is red." |
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After making this statement it is said the egg immediately turned blood red." |
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Well there's my something-new for the day, and it's early here. It's gonna be a good day. |
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//legend says that Mary Magdalene was bringing cooked eggs to share with the other women at the tomb of Jesus, and the eggs in her basket miraculously turned bright red when she saw the risen Christ// |
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If that's not a metaphor, I don't know what is. |
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If that's a metaphor, then what is the Easter Bunny? |
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Whew, coulda been hyperbole. |
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I like the Dino-egg twist. Hey this gives me an idea. |
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+ great for Halloween!
( and if I could tell Max that we do have Cadbury
creme eggs in the US) |
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Ah - but they're made by Kraft so they're already a type of horror egg. |
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^ oh well
good ones should made by Lindt! |
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Im not joking. I like Lindt, Ferrero, and Godiva
chocolates,
but they make wonderful confections with their
chocolate, too. I googled Guittard (not ever before
hearing of it) and it appears they make chocolate
and chocolate chips and cocoa, but I couldnt find
any *candy* or confections. Enlighten me if you
can. |
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well thats exactly what I was saying.Guittard does
not make those things, but I believe it is a good
quality chocolate and if I ever see it I would give it
a try. There are a lot of small hand crafted
chocolate places and one in the next town from
me that just make really good candies but they are
not well known because they are local. those are
probably the best chocolates made in the US.
Small hand crafted companies. |
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There is some very good chocolate made in the
USA but none of comes from the giant toxic factory
companies like Kraft. Kraft made Cadburys is
horrible now that it's totally overloaded with sugar.
It's a cheap and nasty product only eaten by those
who don't know any better. |
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There was a chocolatier here in Michigan not far
from I94 that unfortunately went out of business
when they retired a few years ago that had the best
truffles in the world. Imaginative flavors like rose or
black pepper and such. The Chocolate Garden, they
called themselves. |
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^mmmm the Chocolate Garden sounds so
heavenly! |
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