Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Not so much a thought experiment as a single neuron misfire.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


                         

Testicicle

 C...c...c...cold Testic...ic...ic...le
  (+2, -13)(+2, -13)(+2, -13)
(+2, -13) 		  [vote for,
against]

He is so cool around the ladies and rumoured to have excellent staying power in the sack. He never tells anybody about his Testicicle.

Before he got his first Testicicle, he was sexually incompetent, easily aroused and quick to climax. He would build up so much sexual frustration in the presence of women that when the time for intimacy came, he would always blow it; literally.

So, he placed an anonymous order online for the product. It arrived soon after, and he was overjoyed. He had a big date that night. Following the instructions, he placed his Testicicle into his undershorts. He found comfort in how the product was intelligently cupped and contoured for his anatomy. Excitedly, he hastened to pick up his date.

His date was beautiful, and clearly attracted to him. Things progressed, and soon he began to experience the telling throbs of arousal. This was his signal to stimulate his Tesicicle.

With a single nonchalant movement he reached down, and in an operation that appeared to be the adjustment of his undershorts, as men often do, he squeezed his Testicicle. This caused the membrane inside to break and the chemicals inside to blend, to start a reaction that would reduce the overall temerature of his Testicicle.

This had the ultimate effect of slowing down blood flow in the region, and destroying spermatozoa, which greatly reduced his sexual tension. He later joked with his unknowing, admiring friends that he would have married that girl... "if she wasnt so frigid."

—schmendrick, Oct 08 2005

neuticles http://www.cnn.com/...ntion.ap/index.html
all credit to tc who found it. [po, Oct 08 2005]

testicicles http://www.test-icicles.com/
theyre a cool band [benfrost, Jan 19 2006]


Please log in.
If you're not logged in, you can see what this page looks like, but you will not be able to add anything.



Annotation:







       The way I understand it coldness in that particular region makes things shrink. I can see how this would work. The partner would be so overcome with laughter that the male partner would be completely on his own by the time climax arrived. Probably quite a few minutes later. So yeah, the idea would work. In a way... Also guys adjusting themselves in public, while maybe common, not attractive.
—PollyNo9, Oct 08 2005
   

       yeah, you're right this is an awful idea.
—schmendrick, Oct 08 2005
   

       Medically ignorant, too.
—bristolz, Oct 08 2005
   

       my ignorance doesn't just stop at medicine.
—schmendrick, Oct 08 2005
   

       modern equivalent of a cold shower?
—po, Oct 08 2005
   

       I have been finding that your ideas are either fantastic or utter crap. Guess which one this is.
—wagster, Oct 08 2005
   

       There's me misinterpreting again. I thought it was going to be a new way of freezing sperm, in-situ, as it were.
—Dub, Oct 08 2005
   

       I didn't even notice the pun when I first saw the title, I just read it as "testicle". I had the buns ready and everything.
—spiritualized, Oct 08 2005
   

       \\I had the buns ready and everything\\. Eww. Just eww.
—hidden truths, Oct 08 2005
   

       May be activated by bicycling, or by contact with small seats on tractors, snowmobiles, horses, or barstools.
—reensure, Jan 19 2006
   


 

back: main index
business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle