h a l f b a k e r ycarpe demi
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The Super MAGA Hat holds a surprise, as you can probably
imagine.
Shielded inside with tinfoil, the Super MAGA Hat is distributed
to the faithful, for a truly insidious purpose.
Concealed between the layers of tinfoil are a number of very,
very small microwave generators, powered by tiny
solar PV
fibres woven into the hat.
The generators are programmed to focus, on three axes, on the
higher centres of the brain, systematically, to slowly turn the
contents of the wearer's brain-pan into Cervelle de agneau
caramélisée (Caramelised Sheep Brains) while the wearer is
blissfully unaware it is happening.
You know it makes sense,
Let's collect all their glasses afterwards and put them in a big pile.
https://artsandcult...hive/sgFZs6YvxPx3tQ
[doctorremulac3, May 11 2022]
Same with their shoes.
https://www.alamy.c...ation-75038844.html
Because, recycle right? [doctorremulac3, May 11 2022]
Thoughts on why we separate into groups.
Sociogenic_20Mitosis
Not a super popular theory but I thought the discussion was interesting. [doctorremulac3, May 13 2022]
Top left of Foxnews
https://thekidsguid...motioncode=X50DB22A
Free him? Why? [4and20, May 15 2022]
This exact identical idea only cheaper. TAKE THAT MAGA WOMAN!
https://rarehistori...killing-units-1942/
Scrambles their brains for pennies an execution rather than using all that fancy technology. [doctorremulac3, May 15 2022]
Russell’s Paradox
https://plato.stanf...es/russell-paradox/
The set of all sets that are not members of themselves is the only set that does not contain itself, except when it does. [Voice, May 15 2022]
You mean like this?
https://www.youtube...watch?v=kQYW_ITznX4
Shoot [4and20, May 17 2022]
[link]
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You devious son of a bitch, I'm in. [+] |
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I swear these things already exist, and Ruth Ginsburg was
killed because she was CEO of the company manufacturing
them. |
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//MAGA... brains...//
I sense a problem here. The two may be mutually exclusive. |
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Even a cockroach has a a brain... after a fashion. |
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An airing of grievances[-] Although I would have bunned it if if were for MY grievances. [+] Nah, probably I wouldn't. [-] "Hah hah, x political party should all just commit suicide" just isn't up to the standards I have for an idea. |
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The soylents of the lambs. |
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Not particularly a grievance, [Voice]. More like a post hoc
explanation. |
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2 fries, that physically wounded me. |
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I was going for an Irish accent. |
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No, [Voice], more like //contents of head inside red hat
gradually barbecued by stupidity//. |
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Let's suppose that, in any given population, there's some
sort of bell- curve distribution of intelligence, and it's likely
to be correlated to some extent with economic status,
educational qualification, social connectedness and other
predictors of quality of life. |
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Let's suppose we're worried that the lower half of the bell
curve is vulnerable to manipulation by sinister demagogues,
based on imagined grievances. |
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How much being- a- dick- to- the- lower- half- of- the-
distribution would it take before that, in itself, became a
non- imaginary grievance? |
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I doubt the lower half of the distribution blames the politicians for random dickishness, why? |
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edit: Oh, you mean dickishness done by the politicians? I suspect the less intelligent are also the most easily manipulated such that they can't effectively blame their troubles on the most likely causes (their own lack of ability) or on secondary and tertiary contributing factors like laws and the politicians who pass them. But again, why? |
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So the idea is to murder MAGA supporters? Do you
murder their children as well? |
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No, we give them healthcare and an excellent education so
hopefully they grow up smarter than their parents. |
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After murdering their parents. Okay. |
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Well, the idea certainly isn't without precedent.
(links) |
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So what I hear you saying is that you'll give my kids extra educational and financial support and all I have to do is wear this red hat with some suspicious coils on it? On a more serious note a lot of disadvantaged people actually would die to give their children a better start in life. |
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We gave up talking about Drumpf for lent I thought. I
guess lent season is over. |
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Sigh. Oh well, it was nice while it lasted. Back to
Hatebakery
mode I guess. |
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DOWN WITH THIS SORT OF THING |
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In purely solar terms, the hat does protect you from enlightenment, but does increase the number of unthinking red necks. |
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The frigin hat is just another introduced wedge to be driven with the sole purpose of segregation. |
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The formula has never changed... why do we still submit to it? |
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Talking monkeys... ugh.
Will we ever grow up? |
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You frequently seek to divide yourself off from the
rest of humanity as a feature of your personality and
unique character. No one is pushing you to do that
besides you. |
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Maybe there's a reason people to separate into
groups. At some point a process that repeats
constantly over millions of years has to be termed
"natural". As to whether that's good or bad, nature
has no such construct. |
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Posted an idea about that a while ago. (link) |
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//You frequently seek to divide yourself off from the rest of humanity as a feature of your personality and unique character. No one is pushing you to do that besides you.// |
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I just "am" different [Ray], and I always have been. No pushes were needed.
Physically, mentally, and perceptually, I'm different. It's not something I like or dislike. I do not strive to separate myself, but I do feel quite alien at times.
I'll just say that if there are others out there like me I haven't met them yet. |
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I'll give you just one example, and then you tell me:
At 53 years of age my sternum has still not fused and I can crack it the way others can crack their knuckles. |
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Ever heard of such a thing before? Because the doctors I've asked haven't, and that's just one quirk.
Listing all the differences I've come across would take days. |
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I could see Monty Python doing a sketch of that
famous scene. |
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Then one guy stands up, points to the real
Sparticus and yells "I'M NOT SPARTICUS! THAT'S
HIM! THAT'S THE REAL
SPARTICUS!". |
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And the rest of the guys stop, look at the rat and
sit down and say "Yea, actually that is the real
Sparticus, just
kidding." quietly nodding and mumbling in
agreement. |
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It is a Python joke. From Life of Brian - "You are all individuals, you are all different!" A voice from the crowd says "I'm not." |
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That's a joke about Sparticus? |
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I was referring to my joke above, obviously. |
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//It is a Python joke. From Life of Brian// I
think you meant to refer to MY joke above.
"Everybody's unique. Except me." |
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To which I'd reply: "So?" |
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So maybe many people are just different and seek
both separation and identity while also seeking
compsnionship with similar types. It's that whole
semi-social animal instinct going on. |
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Yes, we know. You remind us every fifth post of how
unique you are. |
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By saying "Everybody's unique except me."? |
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Guess no jokes are allowed on this post. I didn't get
the memo. |
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I think he's talking to me [doc].
You only remind us how unique you are every seventh post. |
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Oh good. For a minute I though people were being
nasty on the Halfbakery. What was I thinking? |
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Anyway, to get back to the subject, I think we're
wired to form into groups and compete for
resources,
be they tasty swamp lizards to bring back to the
cave
for dinner or global geopolitical dominance. It's
been going on forever but I think every generation
assumes their situation in unique. The
circumstances might
change, but the biological drives behind conflict
are probably the same. |
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// I think you meant to refer to MY joke |
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I would claim to be the same, but you all know I'm way better than you. |
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When you said "I'm way better than you." did you
mean to say I'm way better than you? |
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I'd disagree, we're reasonably similar in value. |
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Nope, I'm tippy top ^_^. You do realize I'm joking right? that even if I thought I was better even I wouldn't be so socially inept as to proclaim it in all seriousness? sheesh. |
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Yes V, I got the joke. Very good. |
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Mine was a joke as well. I took your joke
statement
and flipped the meaning by removing the quotes
(as
a joke). |
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I'm thinking none of us should quit our day jobs to
become comedians. I think I've struck out about 3
times on this post alone. |
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Our hearts are in the right place though. I think
we're all trying to lighten up this... well... not
super
unifying and friendly idea post. |
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Regarding the "Free Trump Guide": First, take the gold out of his toilet and give it to lawyers poorer than Rudy... |
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So Donald Trump is the center of the universe? What's
with this bizarre obsession? |
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Guess the Trump-centric Hatebakery is back. Oh
well, sure was nice
to get a break there for a while. |
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Whoa, I just realized, the cult of Trump-hate is for
me! I've seen the light! I'll write some protest
chants for our rallies. |
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"Piles of glasses! Piles of shoes! MAGA voters get
what's due!" |
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"MAGA voters hear us shout! Fill the boxcars ship
them out!" |
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"MAGA swine there's no ablution! There's just one
final solution!" |
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"MAGA crowds like witches covens, put them all
into the ovens!" |
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Wow! Obsessive hate really does give your life
meaning! What a fool I've been! |
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See link for this exact identical idea but done
much cheaper. Scramble their brains the exact
same way as suggested by this idea but for
pennies an
execution instead of using all that high tech. |
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Remember, it's not genocide if really clever people
like us are doing it. |
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//Donald Trump is the center of the universe?// |
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A thing cannot be the centre of another thing if the two things are the same thing. |
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But... the... thing... center... |
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you mean Donald Trump IS the universe? |
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Can I make a black hole joke? Get it? That would be
some kind of butthole reference. Yes? Funny? No? |
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Who let those crickets in here? |
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Should be an orange hole? |
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Because Trump is orange! God that never gets old. |
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Answer: DONALD TRUMP!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHokay. |
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Voice, regarding your link: "Russell’s paradox is the
most famous of the logical or set-theoretical
paradoxes. Also known as the Russell-Zermelo
paradox, the paradox arises within naïve set
theory by considering the set of all sets that are
not members of themselves." |
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Although very interesting, it fails to mention how
orange Trump is. Any theory that doesn't end with
the conclusion that Trump is orange is invalid. Let
me demonstrate: |
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"In condensed matter physics, a Bose–Einstein
condensate (BEC) is a state of matter that is
typically formed when a gas of bosons at very low
densities is cooled to temperatures very close to
absolute zero;273.15 °C or;459.67
°F). Under
such conditions, a large fraction of bosons occupy
the lowest quantum state, at which point
microscopic quantum mechanical phenomena,
particularly wavefunction interference, become
apparent macroscopically." |
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See the flaw in that theory? No mention of how
orange Trump is, therefore invalid. Without the
central universe being referenced (Trump) as a
starting point for all theories, the theory is
invalidated. |
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We just need to follow the science. I call it the
OMB unification theory, all scientific studies need
to come to one conclusion: "Orange man bad.".
This
simplifies science, physics, particle mechanics, the
incredibly complicated world simplified with one
unifying theory of everything. |
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I'll take my Nobel prize payoff in a lifetime supply
of bottled fizzy waters please. Glass bottles only.
Cans are acceptable. Unflavored obviously. |
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(But seriously Voice, thank you for putting up
something on this post that's actually
interesting.) |
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//a gas of bosons at very low densities// sounds like some kind of political insult |
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I like that. Now THAT'S an argument knock out punch. |
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"You sir are like a gas of bosons at very low densities,
identical to such in level comprehension of what I
just
said!". |
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My comeback would be "Huh?". |
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// identical to such in level comprehension of what I just said!".// |
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That would mean, "we are on the same wavelength. You understood me perfectly" |
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Well, no, we're talking about a non sentient group
of
particles here. It doesn't understand anything. |
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But hey, I am so down with discussing this instead
of
the the discussion of incident light
hitting the epidermis of some public figure and
bouncing off and commenting on the various
wavelengths of the light reflected while other
wavelengths are absorbed and the perceived hue,
saturation and luminance by the rods and cones of
the retina. |
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//I am so down with discussing this instead// |
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Really? Because you keep bringing up the other thing |
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Mmmmm. Trump. So orange, so hateable. All of life's
trials and tribulations fade away when I hate on
thee. |
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Okay, has this dead horse been beaten enough for
one day? Yea, I think we're good. |
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You do realize that all of this Trump talk is just a crass distraction for everyone else pining away in desperate hope of learning even more about just how truly unique I really am.
I for one find it very rude and I weep for their loss.
But enough about me, let's talk about me, what do you think of me? |
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Wait... you're not me, did you mean let's talk
about me? |
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My uniqueness is in how I never talk about how
unique I am, possibly the only person in the world
who never brags about how unique he is the way
that I don't. |
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I think my other greatest attribute is how humble I
am, probably the most humble person on Earth.
The humility of others is absolutely horrible
compared to mine, frankly I'm embarrassed for
them. My humility makes all the humans in history
look disgraceful by comparison. Frankly I think I
should be made an honorary god because I'm so
humble. |
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Yes, you are in fact me, I'm glad you talked about me and our extreme modesty may be exceeded only by the enormous bravery and restraint displayed in not only admitting to a deity-level of humility, but also by not smiting ourself for forcing the admission from me. |
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I forgive ourself but that doesn't make it any easier on we. |
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My mind’s been blown…or… our mind’s been blown. |
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I always had a suspicion I was someone else. No
one person could hold so much godlike humility. |
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Hence the reason for the Trinity. It takes three to
hold all that awesomeness. |
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But... if we're one... we're not a trinity... |
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Will this be on the test? |
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//It takes three to hold all that awesomeness// |
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Well one of me is just pure will and doesn't need to be corporeal of course.
Then there's groups of of me and then there's just consciousness itself and then it gets really messy after that.
Y'know... that old chestnut. |
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[DrR] I have discovered your secret, you are Trump. |
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Despite not being orange? |
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The next person to say the O word will receive a swift kick to the genitals. |
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[Link] Orange He Nothing should be in prison, where assholes get the attention he craves. Any doctor knows that you don't need genitals if you're taking it in the ass. |
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I’ll take your word for it. |
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"wearer is blissfully unaware it is happening." |
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OMG, Please don't drag me into this. |
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