Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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Super-shocker 100

Two squirt guns, an electric cattle-prod, and some duct-tape.
  (+23, -3)(+23, -3)(+23, -3)
(+23, -3)
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Take two Super-Soakers or other squirt guns, filled with salt-water, or some other conductive liquid. Duct tape them together to fire in parallel.

Wire up each lead of the cattle prod to a gun, and tape the whole contraption together. Rig the triggers of the guns and the cattle prod to fire simultaneously.

Now you've created an open circuit, which closes if the water jets intermingle upon your hapless victim. Instant 30-foot stun gun.

"There's something very important I forgot to tell you. Don't cross the streams. Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light..."

RayfordSteele, Feb 14 2002

Jaycor http://www.jaycor.c...nt/eme_ltl_nlp.html
nonlethal projectiles page...look around the websiet, they make some pretty cool stuff [dr_photon, Mar 15 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Plasma taser http://www.newscien...cle.jsp?id=99993749
May 21 2003: Baking in Germany, it uses an aerosol spray rather than water to deliver the shock to the target. [krelnik, Oct 04 2004]

Mythbusters - Water Stun Gun http://www.youtube....watch?v=UOwH18YdN7s
[xaviergisz, Jul 30 2009]

Build a laminar flow nozzle http://www.youtube....watch?v=OV-IazRk0sU
Mythbusters problem solved for $15. [RayfordSteele, Jan 30 2012]

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       can I hire you by the day or is it event-linked?
po, Feb 14 2002
  

       Might want to wear waterproof gloves.
phoenix, Feb 14 2002
  

       I nominate Afro to operate it, where is he. Say PIRATES very loudly that usually does it!
po, Feb 14 2002
  

       po, I suppose that depends on what kinky deed you want me to perform...
RayfordSteele, Feb 14 2002
  

       Just keep that sucker away from my new 'Slow Burning National Flag'.
spaceal, Feb 14 2002
  

       I wish to try this out in the name of science...haha
po, Feb 14 2002
  

       Po? You been hittin the Teletubby sauce again?
AfroAssault, Feb 15 2002
  

       wish I knew what b****y chemicals they are putting in it these days.
po, Feb 15 2002
  

       I got as far as "Two squirt guns, an electric cattle-prod, and some duct-tape." and you already had my vote.
st3f, Feb 15 2002
  

       Although misting may cause the thing to short-circuit before hitting your victim, I'm sure that could be remedied by the methods of fluid flow cohesion used in some hi-tech fountains. They shoot water through something that looks like a deep honeycomb. It reduces internal shear in the fluid stream.
seal, Feb 15 2002
  

       I think we have product liftoff. The honeycomb idea evokes visions of a chaingun shocker.
reensure, Feb 15 2002
  

       Ah yeesss...reminds me of the times I went fish-sampling on the backwaters and byways of many a midwestern waterway. As I recall, the DC (motorcycle battery) backpack shocker brings the fish toward the hot end, a wand with a wire hoop at the end. The negative electrode is a stout wire hanging from the backpack, dragging along behind you in the water. Good for sampling small streams. Wear chest-waders or hip-boots. Do not fall on your ass into the water while wearing the backpack.   

       The boat-mounted shocker is better. Used at night when the fish are more active, and usually AC. That means some annoying noise from the generator. You stand on two 'dead man' switches on the bow platform and steady your self against the railing. Two long booms hang straight out from the bow like a two-pronged fork, the two outside prongs. From these hang the electrodes, some flexible conduit about 3 feet long. Two floodlights illuminate the water in front of the boat. You have in your hands a long-handled dipnet, and your job is to scoop up the fish as they swim up from depth in a kind of spiral, in the general direction of the water surface near the electrodes. Someone in the stern operates the equipment and guides the boat through the area to be sampled. When you have a tub full of fish, you go back and weigh and measure them, or maybe you get your data and release the fish relatively unharmed.   

       So I wonder what fish-like movements people would make when 'sampled' in this manner? Probably should release them, too, once you have the data.
entremanure, Feb 16 2002
  

       Ha! "harmlessly immobilise people". I love corporation-speak. Nice link, Steve.
DrBob, Feb 16 2002
  

       Hardly 'corporation-speak'...it knocks them over and aside from what's described as a few seconds of immobility and possibly going 'whump' on their faces, it does no lasting damage. Lot less than bullets, anyway...I want one..
StarChaser, Feb 17 2002
  

       The HSV link and the information therein is amazing. Thank you for posting the link Steve.
bristolz, Feb 17 2002
  

       Isn't there a risk of cancer or something? If there is enough UV to ionise air then it can't exactly be good for you...
RobertKidney, Feb 17 2002
  

       StarChaser, you mean if they don't smack their face or crack their skull on the pavement when they go down?
DrBob, Feb 18 2002
  

       It actually says that unless they're unbalanced when they're hit, they won't fall over; and I kind of think that giving cops an alternative to shooting someone is a good thing.
StarChaser, Feb 18 2002
  

       Yes, I agree with the second part of that, but (just to prolong the argument) how many are going to be 'balanced' when they get zapped? I suspect that most of them are going to be either walking or, more likely, running away.
DrBob, Feb 19 2002
  

       If you shoot people, they also tend to fall over.
pottedstu, Feb 19 2002
  

       And sometimes they don't get back up. This way, they might, once the cops have finished with them.
StarChaser, Feb 22 2002
  

       I wasn't quibbling with the ethics of the thing, StarChaser. Merely the assertion that it was 'harmless'.
DrBob, Feb 22 2002
  

       It is less harmful than being shot. It's less harmful than being beaten over the head with a club until you quit wiggling. 'Harmless' is shorter to write than 'less harmful'.
StarChaser, Feb 23 2002
  

       So is "fluffy" but that doesn't make it true.
DrBob, Feb 23 2002
  

       Sadly, I do not own a cattle-prod with which to try this out. po, can I borrow yours?
RayfordSteele, Feb 23 2002
  

       I gave it back to you, honest. <she said shamefaced and "wiggling">
po, Feb 23 2002
  

       Oh that's right... it's in my sock-drawer. I thought those socks were getting a little more frisky than normal...
RayfordSteele, Feb 23 2002
  

       It isn't going to hurt them any more than having a cop tackle them at full run. It will actually hurt them LESS, since they don't have two hundred pounds of fast moving cop hitting them, either. It doesn't do any harm in itself, if you want to tightass it that far, so it is harmless.
StarChaser, Feb 23 2002
  

       Jaycor tactical systems (JTS) is currently baking this. They also make the sticky shocker (launchable stun gun that, well, sticks to you), and an electric version of those road spikes the cops have. The most hilarious thing they make (the main JTS product) is pepperball (paintballs with powdered pepper spray in them instead of paint).It would seem that they are ripping off of of my company's(Nintendork Labs) ideas. We must go and patent the Nintendork Labs Robotic lawn Mowerand Electric Mouse trap. The Nintendork Labs logo (the smiley face) and the use of plenty of duct tape ensures you that your new Pneumatic Rapier Launcher, AOL CD launcher , or Hyper Death Ray will be fun to operate and that it meets the exacting quality standards of Nintendork Labs (we use LOTS of duct tape to ensure that your new Napalm powered jet pack will not fall apart or explode as much as other inferior products, like those made by ACME corporation).Don't for get to try our new lond distance microwave MASER, for long distance cooking or the new battery powered battery changing robot (never go around and change all of those batteries yourself again...).
dr_photon, Mar 20 2002
  

       You should add some salt to the water. The salt makes it more conductive. And also some chemicals to keep the stream together instead of seperating into drops or misting away (something like this HAS to exist?).
dr_photon, Mar 20 2002
  

       molten lead? that would burn/maim/kill them (advantage/disadvantage?). Or just use a solder launching gun! I have Radio Shack desoldering iron (like a hollow tip solder iron with a bulb on it so solder will be sucked inside and then "expelled").I can fill it with <really really really hot> solder and then shoot a glob about 2.5 feet (the warning label says it can do 4). or get one of those 2000 watt "solder baths" that are like big fondu pots (pot for melting cheese that you dip stuff into) and dump it on someone (like people in medieval[sp.] times dumped hot/burning tar on peopel invading their castles, only solder is the modern version). make sure to have some high-priced lawyer on your side if you do this, however.
dr_photon, Mar 20 2002
  

       Fondue pots. Hmm... now there's an underdeveloped topic all its own.
RayfordSteele, Mar 22 2002
  

       This one gets my vote just for the sheer brashness of the idea. Somebody should build one.
dijontoothpaste, Apr 28 2003
  

       German engineers are baking something similar to this which they call a "Plasma Taser". See link.
krelnik, Jun 09 2003
  

       I wonder if the super soakers had an aerosol type spray, with streams well uncrossed, if there would be minature bolts of lightning between the two charged clouds as they drifted closer?
bungston, Jun 09 2003
  

       Haha! Don't cross the streams!   

       Love that movie.   

       Will it work against the giant Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man?   

       By the way, I finished an Asteroids game with some new ideas put in. Link is in my account page.   

       Email me what you think.
DesertFox, Jan 30 2005
  

       Mythbusters did this. Unfortunately it didn't work; the salt water did not conduct electricity very well.
xaviergisz, Jul 30 2009
  

       He did say, //or some other conductive liquid//... the real problem is droplets which break the circuit.
4whom, Jul 30 2009
  

       You'd think that when the mythbusters have busted a myth that myth was essentially already dead. Extensive and repeated testing has found that even the full blast from a "super soaker" is unable to carry enough current to shock a person at any distance further than arms length.
WcW, Jul 30 2009
  

       Oh I'm so going to have to check that out when I get home.
RayfordSteele, Jul 30 2009
  

       //You'd think that when the mythbusters have busted a myth that myth was essentially already dead//   

       ...Actually, I reckon those guys get it wrong all the time. They both clearly don't have much of an understanding of testing procedures "we'll bust this myth by making this dodgy comparison". I think ther'es scope for a "myth-busters-busters" crew to have a show.
Custardguts, Jul 30 2009
  

       What about conductive silly-string (or a related squirtable cohesive air-drying substance, eg AB foam)? It would probably need to be stronger than the available party goo, and I don't know how it could be made electrically conductive enough (iron filings in the mix? Shake well before use...). A spring-loaded blade below the nozzle to 'reset' for the next shot.
neutrinos_shadow, Jul 30 2009
  

       Actually for all of their nonsense I think the results are usually a foregone conclusion. Many of the things that they try would be dangerous if they hadn't been tested extensively in a more careful way. They simply pretend to be surprised when they do, or don't, get their eyebrows burned off. A crafty research team vets all of the myths. Most of this stuff is pretty simple to work out on paper.
WcW, Jul 30 2009
  

       It could be scaled up to firehose proportions for massive crowd control. That'd be the Super Shocker 1000.
JackyD, Aug 03 2009
  

       Bunned this one 22 years ago.
doctorremulac3, Apr 22 2024
  

       You had me at cattle prod.
Voice, Apr 22 2024
  


 

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