h a l f b a k e r yThe Out-of-Focus Group.
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Conventional ouija boards tend to have a limited
reach, and earlier than 1880 you have to have really
press hard on the board to get clear reception
It's the electrical interference and all those
fraudulent "419" Morse code messages sent out by
Farady.
Step 1 was the all-brass Steam-driven
ouija board
with quite crystal-clear comms almost back to
1712.
Kind of handy for talking with the steam kings. In
particular - Brunel - why he didn't put arsenic on
the
flaps
on the Pneumatic Railway, so the rats would learn
not
munch on them?
Step 2 is reversing the polarity of the steam, so
being
able project adverts into the past.
(note to self)
Sitting in A&E waiting for these burns to looked at,
Step 3 is making a
"Don't cross the steams" warning notice.
[link]
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This is far and away the best idea on this entire page. |
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^ Aha, that's the cunning part, the real idea is hiding
(in
microdot form) under the half-croissant (top left). |
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// why he didn't put arsenic on the flaps on the Pneumatic Railway, so the rats would learn not munch on them? // |
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The rats were attracted by the tallow used as the sealing compound, not the leather itself. Further, arsenic is relatively slow-acting, so the rats would only die sometime after doing the damage. If the general rat population is large, killing the ones in the immediate vicinity of the rail line just creates a "void" into which other rats will migrate. |
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A fast-acting poisonous compound such as a cyanide would be more effective at limiting damage. This would cause a degree of unnatural selection to occur, penalizing those rats that took a fancy to the pipe seal. |
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But the real answer would of course be to electrify the pipe to a high voltage and capable of delivering sufficient current such that any rat climbing on to it got instantly fried. This works admirably well on squirrels which bridge insulators to overhead power lines. |
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Personally, I think wind would be the way to go. As in...Gone
with the Wind. Hahahaha. |
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