h a l f b a k e r yQuis custodiet the custard?
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I think there's scope to make the social kiss - which I'm taking to be a
kiss on both cheek - a useful means of communicating interesting
information or something about yourself. This would be done by a short
message written onto your temple in front of where your co-kisser's
eyes should be.
This message could be public information ("Kissing can
spread germs"), useful facts ("Elephants have four knees"), things the
other person might have forgotten ("My name's Mark"), or perhaps the
first half of a beautiful haiku on one side and the other half on the
other side.
Elephant skeleton
http://www.oxonart....95-0F99FFEC1F1E.jpg
An umbrella stand isn't just for Christmas .... [8th of 7, Nov 08 2009]
Elephant diagram
http://www.talkorig...en/struct-fig2a.gif
Showing relation of musculature to skeleton [8th of 7, Nov 08 2009]
Elephants' elbows and knees are actually elbows and knees.
http://www.biologyc...heets/elephant.html
So there. [MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 08 2009]
[link]
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// Elephants have four knees // |
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Elephants cannot jump, because they lack true "knees". |
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The lower points of flexion in their fore and hind limbs correspond to the carpal and tarsal bones in primates. What humans refer to as "knees" and "elbows" are much higher up in the limb. |
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Well, obviously, if the message on one side of your head was
"Elephants have four knees" there'd be room for your
explanation and caveats on the other side. |
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fresnel lens sunburn --> apple cheeks --> Messages should probably be in, say, lime green for maximum legibility. |
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Then they could say 'If you can read this, you're not red-green colour-blind'. |
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What's half a Haiku?
Seventeen syllables does
Not divide by two. |
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Shut up, [csea]. You're just trying to distract readers from the critical issue here, which is elephant knees. This idea may have some merit but it's not going anywhere unless the elephant's knees (or lack of them) problem is resolved first. |
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Yes, advertising potential, but who's going to want to have a toll free number for the Elephant's Knees information Helpline on the side of their face ? Would not a baseball cap be perhaps better for this ? |
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There is no such thing as elephant knee soup. It just does not exist. |
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Ang on a second. Looking at your first link, they look like
proper knees (and elbows) to me. The bones below them
look like tib+fib (rear) and radius+ulna (front), making
those joints the exact counterpartments of human knees
and elbows. |
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Hah! Found a labelled diagram that proves it (clink). They
even have proper kneecaps (though not, of course,
elbowcaps). |
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//elephant's arse// They only have one? |
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Presumably, for a Glasgow Kiss, the tattooed message would read "Incoming!"
In any event, I'm going to fishbone this. Kissing on both cheeks is another of those foul, foreign habits that seem to have insinuated themselves, uninvited into our otherwise manly English culture. A stout handshake followed by a confident pronouncement about the number and nature of an elephant's knees should be quite sufficient for polite company. |
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//where do they live? // They live in various parts of mainland Europe, in my experience. Not so much on the off-shore islands, where a head-butt is a more common greeting. |
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I'm pretty sure the whole cheek kissing thing was invented by the french. |
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// a head-butt is a more common greeting. // |
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Only as a sign of affection between family members and very close friends. |
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..but what if they close their eyes when bestowing the kisses? |
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So they won't see the elephant - or its knees (if any) after all ? |
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// the whole cheek kissing thing was invented by the french // |
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Close, in the sense that the french pioneered arse-licking. Having been buggered by the Germans on a number of occasions, it was a logical (and for them, not even particularly demeaning) progression. |
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Hmm, sounds like four-knee-cation. |
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