Squeaky hinge compound

Some doors, especially big, old, heavy doors to gothic mansions, just demand that when opened the hinges should emit a long-drawn-out rusty squeak in the approved Van-Helsing-Crucifix-And-Wooden- Stake-Dracula-Has-Risen manner.

When they swing smoothly inwards with a pathetic little "skwwikk" sound, the effect is rather spoilt.

But now, the "Frankenstein's Castle Door" sound is available to all; simply dribble a few drops of Squeako hinge-squeaking compound onto your hinges for that authentic Igor-Never-Bothers-With-Oil sound. A powerful volatile solvent/degreasant removes any trace of existing lubricant, and then evaporates, leaving behind a complex, gritty paste of metal particles and oxides for that spine-tingling horrible metallic screeching noise.......