h a l f b a k e r ySugar and spice and unfettered insensibility.
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A guy knocks on my door today and wants to "replace my water meter." I don't have any water problems that I know of. This is the second time a guy has come to inspect the meter. I'm thinking, "Hmmm - FBI, CIA, National Insecurity Administration setting up to tap my water pipes? Maybe the first tap
failed and they are now installing Snowden proof technology?"
Castle keepers used to watch for wave patterns in containers of water sitting on the floor of the structure to detect invasion tunnels being dug by the enemy. Water tells a story.
The water microphone exists [2]. Send a guy dressed in water dept. clothing and driving a water dept. truck to change out the "water meters" that feed enemy embassies, meeting places, hotel rooms, etc. Send the guy into the building to "add the new water aerators to faucets that "will allow a higher volume of water flow - purely for the customer's convenience" but actually act as microphones to transmit speech (or put poison in the water on demand) to the "water meter."
If the enemy tests the water for acid to detect spies, instead listen to the voice induced vibrations in the water pipes via a laser focused on an outside water spigot [3] similar to the way native Americans put their ears to the rails to hear oncoming trains.
If the laser is detected utilize hydrophones or have the microphones convert or interpret the human conversation frequencies to/from the same low frequency high amplitude frequencies that Blue Whales have evolve that allow them to speak to one another across immense Oceans [1].
Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean I'm wrong.
[1] Whale communications
http://www.natgeotv...-communication.aspx [Sunstone, Jan 27 2016]
[2] Water microphone
https://en.wikipedi...ki/Water_microphone [Sunstone, Jan 27 2016]
[3] Laser system converts window vibrations to speech
https://duckduckgo....ons&t=ffab&ia=about [Sunstone, Jan 27 2016]
[link]
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//Americans put their ears to the rails to hear
oncoming trains.// Only once, presumably. |
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Damn google books, I have to do this manually, walking by
the ocean "Waterhouse imagines that the disturbance will
propagate across the Pacific and into some super-secret
Nipponese surveillance device made of bamboo tubes and
chrysanthemum leaves; Nip listeners will know Waterhouse
has gone that way. In turn the water swirling about
Waterhouse's feet carries information about Nip propeller
design and the deployment of their fleets..." |
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Neal Stephenson - Cryptonomicon |
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Today I learned spies are acidic. |
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Thank you for doing that, [not_morrison_rm]. |
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I first read that in trade edition but it's in the collection now in hard cover as well. |
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Just because they are out to get you, doesn't mean you are paranoid. |
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//Americans put their ears to the rails to hear oncoming
trains.// |
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When I was a Canadian I tested this theory by putting my ear
on the track just AFTER a train passed through. I couldn't
detect a thing although there is the possibility it was there
but I am train deaf. |
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If the theory is that the noise travels ahead of the train, then obviously you would hear nothing by listening after it. |
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Wouldn't it be easier to simply monitor your internet and
telephone like they do everyone else? What possible secrets
could they extract from overhearing you in the bath? Also it
sounds like you are totally doing the "person of interest"
thing pretty wrong if the most effective way to monitor you
is to listen to your mumblings, you totally need to up your
game to sketching indecipherable plans on massive
whiteboards and sending encoded messages to your
contacts using newspaper crosswords dropped in public
trash bins. You also need to try to get some red mercury.
About a kilo. Not any other color, the red type. |
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// I tested this theory by putting my ear on the
track// The trick is to send someone _else_ to listen
to the track. If they don't come back, there was a
train. |
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