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How much time off do you have on the books? You might want to use some of it (Dr. Norman recommends...) |
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Well school's out, so possibly some months? Let me guess
dr norman recommends spending some time with a woman
with a padded backside to cure mental silliness. |
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We would market these for you. |
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Why would pressing the layers together cause
spontaneous combustion? I'm not saying it won't,
but why will it? |
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My understanding is that oily rags combust because
of slow, non-combustive oxidation which raises the
temperature, and vice versa, in a runaway manner.
On that basis, you'd expect closely-packed oily rags,
with little of the oil exposed to air, to not combust. |
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Well, it rather depends how quickly and
forcefully they are compressed, doesn't it ? |
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There could be a bit of nitroglycerine in there, and the deceased could drop in from some height. There would need to be a spike of straightened fish hook design to prevent unseemly bouncing. |
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Admittedly, pressure is not a factor in oily rag
combustion, so instead the pressure will apply oil to
the rags inside the chair. The oil will be contained
in blisters. |
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a bit of piezoelectric current, created by placing the cadaver, might trigger the reaction? |
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But what if my kitty accidentally jumped up on said
chair? Not good. Not good at all. |
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The bags of nitrocellulose, nitroglycerine, fulminate of mercury would have to be placed on the cadaver, and not the chair. (Same goes for all the phosphorus.) |
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Guaranteed to break the ice at your planet's North Pole in January. |
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plus something about hemorrhoids |
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// But what if my kitty accidentally jumped up on said
chair? // |
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Your dwelling would burn to cinders but your kitty would
be completely unharmed. Cats are infuriatingly good at
that sort of thing. |
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Not the human spontaneous combustion, The Chair and Rags spontaneously combustion. Human is entree. |
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I keep reading this as 'Spontanious Human Combustion Choir'. |
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"Burst into Flames" not "Burst into Song". Easy
mistake. |
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hah! Although I've read the title many times, this
morning I read *Spontaneous Human Combustion
Hair*. ( a flaming red-head?) |
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The misreads are better than the idea. Ha. |
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