h a l f b a k e r yOn the one hand, true. On the other hand, bollocks.
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Will teach tracking strategies so that they are constantly under
surveillance and cannot disappear. The society will form search
parties, and discussion groups that can assist with the
psychological aspects of anger and blame when sock pairs are
lost, or when the battery is low, and you cannot
charge your
phone, because you have the charger, but not the USB cable.
A section of the society will deal with conspiracy theories and
attempt at proving or disproving them, and finding out who is
actually behind the plot.
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Annotation:
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Do you do Collective membership ? |
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No. Pens leave of their own accord. |
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Re. the conspiracy theories, do you think one could set up a pantomime moment which would fit the line "They're behind it!*"? |
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*Oh, no they're not!
Oh, yes they are!
etc. |
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Everyone who joins should be suspected of being behind it,
simply because by joining they could throw the scent off of
themselves. |
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Yes, well, you would say that, wouldn't you ? |
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<stares hard at [Vernon]> |
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If your pen has gone missing, I most likely have it. I am a pen
thief extraordinaire, I conjure up means to steal peoples
pens all night. I admit it. I'm guilty. So there. The other stuff
I have no use for. IT'S ALL IN THE PENS. |
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Do you have my nail clippers...s ? |
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I thought we'd settled the science on this one... Aliens! |
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having declared that, one still may need a support group. I am all in + |
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Loss of phone chargers can usually be put down to
voltage fluctuations. If the mains voltage dips
after
your charger has fully charged the phone, the
back-
pressure can suck the entire charger right back
into
the wall and along the wires. Phones can
sometimes
go with them. |
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For similar reasons, if there's a power cut while
you're playing loud music, the room immediately
seems eerily quieter than it was before the music
started. This is because the sound is being sucked
back through the speaker cables. |
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//the sound is being sucked back through the speaker cables// That's rubbish, and you know it. Actually the silence comes from the transformers in your local sub-station, the silence rushes down the wires and comes out of your speakers, hushing other ambient noises and making the room not just seem quieter, but actually quieter. If the sound levels go negative it can damage your hearing a little. So it's best to sing if you experience a power cut |
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