Social Media Hook Alarm

I have noticed on Facebook and twitter that some posts are informational in and of themselves - without requiring you to click through to a link to get the meat of the post, and some posts are "hooky" in that they "spark your curiosity". Actually this goes goes for conversational statements too. Some posts say, "guess what," and some posts say, "here's what."

This would be an AI linguistic analysis program that determines whether a post is "hooky" or not and throws it into the trash can if it is.

An active aspect of this program would proactively answer all hooky posts which parse to "guess what," or, "knock, knock" with, "f you", rather than, "what?", or, "who's there?". And also answer all informational posts automatically with, "thank you."