h a l f b a k e r yI think, therefore I am thinking.
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Busses are a common sight in London, and
anyone riding them will be aware of the
dulcet tones of Emma Hignett performing
such classics as "133 - to - Liverpool
Street - the next stop is - Elephant &
Castle" or the gently menacing, "Please
move down inside the bus".
It's time to bring her
in again, wheel
in a trolley of booze, and encourage her
to re-record the entire catalogue of
messages, only in a far more inebriated
voice. This can then be rolled out into
the night-bus fleet, so as to be more in
keeping with the clientele of that
particular service.
http://www.emmahignett.com/
http://www.emmahignett.com/
"Emma's clients include Microsoft, VISA, Virgin Money, Barclaycard, St John’s Ambulance, Nissan, Tommee Tippee, Mothercare, Early Learning Centres, X-Box and Alton Towers, Samsung and plenty more." - though I'm not suggesting she provide drunken voiceovers for any of these folks. [zen_tom, Jul 10 2014]
[link]
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Lovely idea - alternatively, she could record all the announcements in her normal voice with phrases like "you're my best mate", "are you asking for a fight?" and "are you looking at me?" added on, all in her normal voice. |
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or as I once heard on a tube train from a drunken Glaswegian (is there any other type?) As he pushed the whiskey bottle towards me: "Will ya take a wee drink, or de I have to smash the bottle over yer heeed?" |
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Hell I'd cross the ocean to hear these! Yes. + |
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I was trying to work out what a slurry night-bus was. Maybe something to do with night-soil collection? |
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Sounds like a cocktail to me. Let's have one...or
three. |
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Yes, one double Slurry Night Bus coming up:
2-4 oz Vodka (this to induce one form of "slurry")
2 oz Tomato Passata (this for the other "slurry" - use
chopped tomatoes as an alternative)
3 oz Tomato Juice
œ oz Lemon Juice
2 dashes Worcestershire Sauce
2 dashes Tabasco
1 pinch Celery Salt
1 pinch Black Pepper
Method: Prepare in Highball glass
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Add Celery Salt to the rim of an highball glass.
Pour the chilled Tomato juice, passata and the lemon
juice in the glass.
Add the vodka and spices
Stir
Serve with celery stick and drink on the bus. |
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Yummy...a flurry of slurry's. |
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[zen], You're missing the key ingredient. Where's the Puree'd bus? |
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I was more thinking of slurry announcements. Could be of two types, the first about slurry - “No. 2 tank about to overflow, all staff to relief valves”. The other might be in morse code perhaps? |
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...or "Would the inebriated passenger at the back of the bus who has caused the floor to become covered with slurry please come forward to get a mop and bucket from the driver" |
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Ideally it would repeatedly forget what the next stop was, eventually remembering just after that stop was passed, then immediately forgetting again. |
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Gimme an A, Gimme a P, Gimme another P, Gi.... |
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Vincent vg can you hear me now? |
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