h a l f b a k e r yI CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?
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...because it's just an alarm, not a door lock, but only you
know that.
On the top of the keypad, written by hand on a piece of
adhesive tape is: "Combination: 12345". Any self respecting
burglar will take the easy way in and assume the owner is
forgetful and put a reminder on the top of the
lock. When he
tries to put that combination, or any combination of numbers
in the alarm goes off.
[link]
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'Start' charging? In my state we get charged for any alarm
response, bogus or not. Same for an ambulance call,
whether or not you ride in it, and for the fire department,
even if the property owner wasn't the caller and there isn't
a wisp of smoke to be found. The only way I've found to get
out of the charges that I've found is if you can _prove_ the
response was generated by a prank. |
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A much simpler and far more effective alarm is a dog. It
doesn't even have to be a large dog, just a loud one,
although going with one of the stereotypical guard dog
breeds makes the cops' jobs much easier, as a close
encounter with a snarling pit bull* during a midnight break-
in can conveniently result in a trail of urine leading straight
to the
would-be robber. |
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* He's not vicious at all; he's growling because he's nervous
and confused and tends to default to the 'world's biggest
badass' setting |
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Anyway, shouldn't that be an "anti-burglar alarm" as otherwise it sounds like something for a burglar to use? |
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//we get charged for any alarm response, bogus or
not. Same
for an ambulance call, whether or not you ride in
it, and for
the fire department, even if the property owner
wasn't the
caller and there isn't a wisp of smoke to be
found.// |
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You are kidding, no? Do you, by any chance, not
pay taxes? |
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Here, I believe that commercial premises can be
charged for
more than a certain number of false fire alarms,
but the
basic idea is that the emergency services are
there as
services for use in any actual or suspected
emergency. |
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Is there a "Please tip your paramedic" sign in the
ambulance
too? |
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And in any case, what if the burglar isn't simple? |
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'We' are a commercial premises. Like many rural
businessfolk, my wife and I live upstairs. We pay taxes
unless we can legally avoid them, and because our
residence is zoned as a commercial structure we pay for
every EMS response to our address, no matter the cause.
Maine is a pretty poor state and municipal agencies have to
generate as much of their own revenue as possible. |
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//we pay for every EMS response to our address, no
matter the cause.// |
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Right. So your taxes pay for...? And I realize this is
probably a stupid question, but isn't Maine part of
the USA? Isn't the idea of all being in the same
country that some areas are too poor to pay for
basic services whilst others are too rich to need
them, and so it all averages out? |
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//If it's the sort of system that automatically
summons police assistance, they'll quickly tell you
to take the combination off the 'lock' or they'll
start charging you for the bogus 911 calls.// |
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It's a $4.95 box with an alarm buzzer. |
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As far as kids risking getting their asses beat to
push a buzzer on somebody's door, you should
probably give them more
credit. Ding-dong-ditch has been around for a
while. It's hardly causing an epidemic of sleepless
nights. |
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Around here we just pay for ambulance rides. No fee for fire or police, ever. |
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// ambulance rides. No fee for fire or police, ever. |
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Hmm, what about spontaneous human combustion? Ambulance or fire engine? |
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Or presuming the fire station is near the hospital, set fire to your own front porch, then sneak a ride on the back of the fire engine as it returns to base. |
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I'd rather the fixed fee....round here, if you have an
accident, the private rescue teams race each other to
pick you up. No wonder: if you aren't fully with it you
end at hospital minus all valuables. |
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// Right. So your taxes pay for...? And I realize this is
probably a stupid question, but isn't Maine part of the USA?
Isn't the idea of all being in the same country that some
areas are too poor to pay for basic services whilst others
are too rich to need them, and so it all averages out?
// |
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Yes, that's the idea, but I'm afraid it's all got rather
political. Since money somehow equates to political clout
despite the best intentions of etymologists worldwide, the
richest states get the most and the rest...well, we do okay
for ourselves. |
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// the richest states get the most and the
rest...well, we do okay for ourselves.// |
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But you have all those lobsters and... ah... many
other natural resources! |
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I'm sure a deal could be worked out. For example,
here in the UK, Wales is allowed to call the police
or fire brigade for free, because they're only next
door. And usually if it's a fire call, we send our
special fire engine that we keep for false alarms.
In exchange, we are allowed to call the Welsh
"British" when they win at rugby. |
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This is kinda like the hidden camera antic where they
placed a big red button in the middle of a town
square...and waited nearby with a team of emergency
guys and stuntmen. |
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And inside the house is the rottweiler. |
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