h a l f b a k e r yBuy 1/4, get 1/4 free.
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To try to buy my soul back after that last lottery idea, this
one would use pictograms or ideaograms (I think that's a
word) to illustrate how futile it is to play the lottery.
You would scratch off the losing ticket indicator and it
would
show for instance a kid playing in a sandbox with
an arrow
pointing to one grain of sand saying "This is your chance of
winning, the other grains of sand are the other tickets out
there." Or it would show a graph of what would have
happened if the buyer invested that dollar in the stock
market, or put the time walking to the store to get their
booze and lottery ticket into learning a useful profession.
Sort of like those bottle caps with facts on the underside.
[link]
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Every 10th ticket should have a message saying "YOU'VE WON!!!" when you scratch off the strip with, in small type below "Of course you haven't won, you idiot - you could play this lottery every week for a million years and never win" |
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Also some of the tickets could have information about the
fate of many winners. For example I saw somewhere that
70% are broke within 7 years. 90 percent of lottery
winners say five years later that they wish they hadn't
won. |
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I've also heard about people winning millions and
gambling it all
away. Don't need to be a rocket surgeon to figure out
that loser's psychological problems. |
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And coincidentally, my brainiac cousin (who's made
millions developing, patenting and selling vaccines
for the agriculture industry, yes I'm bragging) posted
this link on my Facebook page to a very clever
observation somebody made: |
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$1,400,000,000 lottery divided by 318,900,000 people
equals $4.39, enough to buy everybody in the united
states a calculator." |
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Although after taxes there's probably only enough left
for a pencil and paper. Still, you'd be better off
investing in that. |
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//ideaograms (I think that's a word)// |
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Missed it by >that< much. |
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I think ideaograms are much more interesting and informative than idiotgrams. |
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//Whereas the placebo of buying a lottery
ticket might actually affect mental health and
psychosomatic feedback enough to greatly improve
quality of life at a fraction of the cost.// |
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I was thinking about that, the psychological benefit
of at least having a moment of joy in an otherwise
hopeless life.... |
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You make a solid point B. Gotta give it to you. |
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//70% are broke within 7 years. 90 percent of lottery winners say five years later that they wish they hadn't won.// |
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Ahem.
I would like to volunteer as test subject when looking for exceptions to those rules if I might. |
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Whether or not the following would have any attention
paid to it is irrelevant to its truth: |
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"If you play the lottery, you probably won't win. If you
don't play the lottery, you CAN'T win." |
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"If you win the lottery, you won't win." would be an
interesting slogan. |
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I shouldn't be such a lottery basher. It gives some
people pleasure. I know, "Christ Doc, make up your
mind already." right? |
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