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STD registry

Birds of a feather...
  (+7, -4)
(+7, -4)
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against]

So, let's say Jim walks into the clinic to get tested for STDs and he find out that he has herpes. This is not good news for Jim, for he will have to experience the rest of his sexual career with condoms. Or a shitload of guilt. Either way's not too fun. But there's hope!

Upon diagnosis, the doctor provides Jim with an STD registration form. He will be added to an online profile network with thousands of participants who have shared his experience. He will be allowed to access profiles who share in his exact diagnosis. This way, there's nothing to spread, because it's already there! Pop a few birth control pills, and away you go with full contact (awesome) sex. Any questions?

daseva, Jan 19 2006

HIV types, subtypes, and groups http://www.avert.org/hivtypes.htm
[nomocrow, Aug 06 2007]

Medical Love song http://www.mp3lyric.../medical-love-song/
"My heart is very tender, though my parts are awful raw; you might have been infected but you never were a bore" [imaginality, Aug 06 2007]

Kickstarter: Not alone dating app (2023) https://www.kicksta...ot-alone-dating-app
A "service that will help people suffering STDs to connect with someone and be happy together." $1 pledged of $74,800 goal. [jutta, Jan 28 2023]


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Annotation:







       Baked already. There are dating services that do just this very thing. Try Google.
normzone, Jan 19 2006
  

       No particular reason for an MFD if this is an opt-in network. But maybe those exist already?
DrCurry, Jan 19 2006
  

       [DrCurry], I took the phrase "He will be added" to mean that this was not voluntary. I'm surprised at the number of people that would be ok with their medical details put on a website, whether its readership is limited or not.
hidden truths, Jan 20 2006
  

       British Telecom used to publish an annual STD directory - is this something different?
coprocephalous, Jan 20 2006
  

       I seem to remember that there existed an opt-in HIV database for actors in the, um, adult entertainment industry but I am reluctant to search for it at work.
calum, Jan 20 2006
  

       Actually this would be a way to eliminate all STDs. Just start the registry with a sufficiently large cohort of medically vetted virgins--hmm, what would that have to be nowadays, maybe all the 6-to-8-year-olds in a large country at two-year intervals?--and rigorously enforce a policy of allowing liaisons only between individuals in the same cohort.
Balbillus, Jan 21 2006
  

       Who ever said anything about your medical details going on a website? This is about being in a registry.
Jscotty, Jan 21 2006
  

       good point, [js]!
daseva, Jan 21 2006
  

       I'm surprised that something like this would exist, because this model of illness as something that you either have or don't have seems too simple. Arent't there different strains, such that an additional infection with a slightly different mutation can make things worse, even if you already have another?   

       I know it works that way for some things (smallpox?), but I didn't think HIV was among them.
jutta, Jan 28 2006
  

       more to the point, if Jim (andthe other 'participants')were acting in such a way as to catch herpes, there is a good chance they are going to have other, undiagnosed STD's. Either you then end up with a group horribly ill with every STD known to man (or beast- i'm not judging here) because they are indulging in 'full contact (awesome)' sex, or they still have to use barrier contraceptives. which kind of misses the point. would you trust jim?
tacit, Jan 28 2006
  

       Well the clinic can always place a tattoo on Jim's ass, displaying his most recent visit.   

       That or some kind of registration card, but I would think ass tattoos are harder to forge.
Cuit_au_Four, Feb 10 2006
  

       I'm pretty sure that reinfection was something to be very much avoided, at least in the case of HIV. Plus [tacit]'s point on crossed infections clearly earns this one a bone.
PauloSargaco, Aug 06 2007
  

       [jutta] There are definitely different strains of HIV.
nomocrow, Aug 06 2007
  

       The very first anno I posted, back in '06, I was referring to herpes dating services.
normzone, Aug 06 2007
  

       Sort of a club for incurable romantics, then?
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 06 2007
  

       Monty Python's 'Medical Love Song' seems a pretty appropriate ditty to linkalise here.
imaginality, Aug 06 2007
  


 

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