h a l f b a k e r yIt's not a thing. It will be a thing.
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Everyone in America, just for the asking, can chose to adopt a clone of that little Oriental kid from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. His sole purpose on this planet would be to follow you around all day and call you “Doctor Jones.”
This “Short Round Clone” could also do whatever you tell
him to do and make hilarious one-liners about some alleged Aunt Mimi he once had back in Singapore.
Sure, all this and more is already readily available for just 29 cents a day via Sally Struthers’ Kid-O-Rama, but since we just cracked that pesky little genome code what the hell else can we do with it????
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Can I get mine in the Denise Richards variety and have her call me "Daddy" instead? |
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Sure, why not? As long as he never grows up and sues your ass for treating him like a dog for all those years. |
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The beauty is that they'll never grow up. They're clones, they have no certain inalienable rights...At the ripe old age of 18, they'll be harvested for parts to help cure the sick and diseased. |
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What's more, your Denise Richards clone could be grown with real breasts. |
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As long as we're at it, a Gretchen Mol or Liv Tyler clone would be great as well- as long as the clones are actual size and *not* Short Round size. |
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Collect the entire set! <g> |
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I'd like a gary coleman version so that every time i have another half-baked idea he can say, "Whatchoo talk'n bout raisin?" |
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Clonploitation. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. I'd like to be called "Dr. Thumbwax" myself. Hmmmm... |
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i would clone webster and have him pick fights with your gary coleman clone, you know...just to see |
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I love this idea. I'm an Oriental kid, or rather, an Asian kid,
and I follow people around all day right now, calling them
'Doctor Jones.' I'm wondering though how many of the
people who would buy into the SRC2000 are pedophiles
looking for the right Asian boy to screw. But that's a
whole nother market, isn't it. It'd also be great to clone
that weird Oriental kid in Boogie Nights who was running
around the house in his tighty whiteys, lighting all those
firecrackers in that drug dealer's house. |
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We could have look-alike compertitions - :will the real Gary Coleman please stand up.... Oh, you are standing up....." |
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After 34 years, Gary Coleman is still a virgin. Said so himself on "Weakest Link" |
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