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The circumstances that preceded getting stuck in the tree were not so complex as the construction of the suit that I had been wearing before it got caught up in the branches, and I fell to the ground outside the sorority house nude, where I now find myself, officer.
It all started the other day at
the amphitheatre when a couple standing behind me observed, in their own words, that I "make for a better door than window". Since I was not immediately familiar with this idiom, I took offence and stormed away after calling out a curse on both of their houses, if in fact they had separate domiciles. I can't be sure, but I'd certainly make them eat their words!
I arrived at the blinds store, still irate, and requested blinds best designed in accordance with Bernoulli's principle. These were provisioned immediately and without question by the knowledgeable blinds specialist. I then fashioned these appropriately aerodynamic blinds into a a fine streamlined suit. By using the same mechanism provided for drawing the blinds I could easily control the pitch of what in effect became many wings.
To make a long story short, doctor, as I was telling the officer outside the sorority house, I decided to show off my new suit in front of the ladies, but it generated such substantial lift that I ended up in a tree. It was only then as I was gazing into the house before me, that I came to appreciate the transparent properties of windows relative to doors, and thus the meaning of the remark that precipitated this ordeal.
As you can see, it's all been a great misunderstanding, magistrate.
Winged Suit
http://www.suckered...-squirrel-suits.jpg [rcarty, Mar 14 2011]
Blinds
http://www.windowbl...dow-blind-pulls.jpg [rcarty, Mar 14 2011]
Phillips Multiplane
http://www.fiddlers...ps_multiplane-2.jpg [mitxela, Mar 14 2011]
good flight technology history resource
http://firstflight....ips_aircraft01.html [rcarty, Mar 14 2011]
Close
http://www.writeups..._flight_suit_h1.jpg [rcarty, Mar 14 2011]
Jade Monkey
http://www.jeweloft...ade_monkey_1055.jpg [ytk, Mar 20 2011]
[link]
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non idea (-) entertaining (+) |
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The idea is a winged suit designed like window blinds. |
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You must find the jade monkey before the next full moon. |
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Where jade monkey is a link to the idea described. |
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Before this court can venturi an opinion on your magnus opus we need an order of facts: You stated that aileron you got into a bit of a flap, coanda nother thing, you took off for the nearest purveyor of blinds, all the rage as I understand. After requisitioning said items you then rolled on down to a sorority house to show the ladies, whom, it must be said, were over-yawed at your attempts of haute couture. |
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Innocent, I proclaim. I will not spill the blood of a laminar. |
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The moon is full and still no jade monkey. I was hoping the closer moon produced some anti-Earth gravity. |
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/The moon is full and still no jade monkey./ |
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(Link) Sorry! It was on my desk under some papers and I
totally forgot about it. My bad. |
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/I was hoping the closer moon produced some anti-Earth
gravity./ |
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If it helps any, I jumped yesterday and it felt like I was a
little higher than usual. |
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I also managed to jump a bit further off the ground. |
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Knock knock.
"I can't come to the door, I'm naked. Who is it?"
"Blind man."
"Oh, in that case, come in."
"Thanks. Where d'you want the blinds?" |
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"I told you I keep them in that case, are you deaf too?" |
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