prelude... The breathless messenger bursts in to the kitchen of the large estate, The stale air reeking of garlic, tomato sauce, fresh clams and huge, muscled Mafiosi, dressed in designer wife beaters. The messenger throws the package onto the kitchen table, hoping and praying that it is good news,
hoping and praying to see another day.
The box is ripped open, and inside: a single, vintage, mid-century Zenith television remote. Everyone freezes. Gasps of horror.
"We've been selected", Guido finally manages to say.
THE PRODUCT
In these times of economic crisis, even the Mafia has to institute cost saving time-management procedures. When the capo di capo comes to town, and all the gang is holed up in the gatehouse, why should they just waste time watching television?
With the new Laser Activated Television Channel Changer, Da boys can practice their marksmanship, and their quick draw techniques without ever having to drive out to the country, saving a small fortune in fuel costs and bullets.
With their laser sights firmly attached to their hand guns, they can change channels, adjust the volume, and turn the television on and off, just by shooting the appropriate buttons on the large remote target mounted on the wall.
Save time, save money, and most of all, BECOME BETTER BODY GUARDS with the new
REMOTE MAFIA LASER ACTIVATED TELEVISION CHANNEL CHANGER