h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Strategically positioned miniature radar units in the corners of
every room continuously monitor all moving objects, focussing
especially on falling small objects and masses, like blobs of
chocolate pudding, splashes of red port, tomato soup, gravy,
coffee, maple sirup, mashed potato's, blood,
pieces of brain
etc.
Information of the trajectory of falling objects is instantly
transmitted to any number of miniature high speed robots.
They
are very low, fast and manoeverable. They sit silently, lurking
under furniture and in corners, awaiting their turn to race
towards the impact site immediately to catch the carpet
treatening substances in a special sponge-lined recepticle
(not
for protecting the object, but for absorbtion of impact related
droplets).
During dinner time, all available units will converge around the
table. They will each have their collision detection program, to
avoid crashing into furniture, feet, pets and eachother.
After a succesful catch the lucky robot moves to a
base-station
where the recepticle is cleaned.
Additionally, a game program of the set could be
voice-activated.
The game would consist of trying to throw a small ball in such
a
way that the robots would lose (miss the catch). Great fun,
and
a learning capability would train the set in developing more
effective movements in the room, effectively improving the
odds
of catching the next (potential) stain.
[link]
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I like this, with a house hold of elderly pets it could save on carpet cleaner and disinfectant. croissant. |
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Our dear pedantic misstress of bliss.
Now I'll read the idea.... |
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(po-I thought that said "with a household of elderly pests", and I had to laugh, granny with her walker trying to trip you, grumps leaving his depends on the bathroom floor, you know..) |
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I wonder if you could hang a little bag somehow under your pets just for those times. While it would make me less-likely to put 'em in my lap, the carpet would stay fresh. |
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Teach your catcher to throw as well, and keep the dog entertained for hours with no hassle. |
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I have visions of this thing preemptively vaporising the family toddler the moment s/he steps in the room... |
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Love the idea, the application of starwars technology to the simple spittoon. Combine it with a high adhesive automatic shoe removing doormat and Mrs I will have little to complain of, although she won't be stuped for long. |
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Don't come home falling down drunk! |
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What about adding some artificial intelligence (AI)to the protectors, similar to the flocking road cones? Flocking protectors that have an inclination to follow people. |
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To my cats I would like to add some "mouse" AI, so they can chase the protectors instead of live animals. |
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