PsyOps Grocery Shop

When you walk into the PsyOps Grocery Shop, your volition will be assaulted from all sides by every dirty and dastardly trick modern advertizing warfare has at it’s disposal. Hunger inducing packaging, impulse purchase product placement: These things are child’s play compared to the psychological onslaught you will subconsciously endure at the PsyOps Grocery Shop. Here, no ploys are disallowed. It is the play ground of amoral marketing. It is also the crucible in which you, as the consumer can pit your psyche against the most aggressive marketing strategies modern marketing has to offer.

Floors are slightly canted to make walking towards the checkouts more difficult than walking farther into the store. The smoothness of the shopping cart’s wheels correlate directly to the weight of produce in the cart, subliminal messages lurk within the music overhead and are printed on every wall, and that dashing/buxom stock-boy/stock-girl (possibly a CIA clandestine operative in training) will hone his/her skills at behavioral manipulation through techniques such as neuro-linguistic programming, and a few others which if we told you about, we would have to marginalize you.

Why? Glad you asked!

If you are strong-willed and sound-minded enough to purchase only what you need then you will enjoy sub-market prices (due to product suppliers voluntarily defraying a portion of their product’s cost to the consumer, in trade for collected data of consumer response to these cutting edge marketing ploys). However, if you are weak of will and mind you will undoubtedly leave with a shopping cart full of shit you really don’t need.