Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Not so much a thought experiment as a single neuron misfire.

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Pseudometer

Reports any measurement
 
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

To be clear, this has nothing to do with tensor fields of arbitrary signature.

This is a scale that can be quoted like temperature, humidity, blood pressure, etc. But you get to choose what it's measuring and what the value is. Your "results" can be applied to any situation or discussion. If somebody quotes a poll from the NY Times, you've got your Pseudometer reading handy to refute any bogus data coming from the mainstream press, scientific journals, legal opinions, or vote results. Backed into a corner at a debate? Perfect time to quote results from the Pseudometer, as many professionals do with surprising results. Blazingly fast and flexible, the Pseudometer is brought to you by PIOTA Industries, well known in comment and punditry circles for pulling it outta their analogues when the chips are down.

When all else fails, quote the Pseudometer. Many do.

minoradjustments, Aug 30 2023

Jason_20and_20The_20Arguenots [xenzag, Aug 31 2023]

The original user's manual, from the 1950s https://en.m.wikipe...Lie_with_Statistics
[pertinax, Aug 31 2023]

SANS ICS HyperEncabulator https://www.youtube...watch?v=5nKk_-Lvhzo
[Voice, Sep 04 2023]

[link]






       This idea is 78% incoherent and 22% wrong.
pocmloc, Aug 30 2023
  

       Even more on my graph. Off the chart. Both values. If everything looks like a nail, you will need a hammer.
minoradjustments, Aug 30 2023
  

       Baked in a form with 'fact checkers' with dials and numbers going from 0 to 100 or from green to red.
mylodon, Aug 31 2023
  

       Here’s your market (link)
xenzag, Aug 31 2023
  

       I want it as a seperate device, not an app. It needs a big display, dials, charts, and blinkenlights. It also needs a data entry keypad where questions can be asked for the delivery of highly ambiguous answers.
Voice, Aug 31 2023
  

       It will need a big, heavy, moveable mahogany frame, for reframing questions. Probably on castors. And positioned using a Disingenuous Sublation engine.
pertinax, Aug 31 2023
  

       // Disingenuous Sublation engine //   

       In tandem with the Infinite Improbability Drive, no doubt.
whatrock, Aug 31 2023
  

       [Voice] We've got the perfect model, lightly used, never dropped. There's loud audio, smoke and effects, and you get to sit at your control panel behind a curtain to the left of the audience pleadings. Please peek under the curtain to check if any of the visitors are wearing red shoes.
minoradjustments, Aug 31 2023
  

       [xenzag] We had a long-standing contract with the Arguenots for elevator pitch graphics and thick sheaves of documents before they decided to go in-house and focused on Total Denial, take no prisoners, watch my Sharpie. We are a kinder and gentler fabrication service, more interested in the dense fogging of data than storming the gates of debate. As an added benefit our traditional approach allows us to service all sides of a conflict concurrently. We believe Jason is being fleeced by his provider and will come back to the fold eventually.
minoradjustments, Aug 31 2023
  

       [Voice] /SANS ICS HyperEncabulator/ The beauty of the Pseudometer is that super-, hydro, or hyper-cabulation is no longer necessary to produce a branded result that is permeated by inclusions. So often anthropomorphized result of random speciation will be colored by wiring and power differences. Quite the contrary, a Pseudometer reading represents the truest form of incabulation, in that it occurs spontaneously. This response was generated by Pseudometer AI. Have a nice day
minoradjustments, Sep 05 2023
  
      
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