h a l f b a k e r yWhy on earth would you want that many gazelles anyway?
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Prosthetic testicles are decidedly boring. Instead of a solid lump of silicone, make it a hollow shell. Inside, place a small vibrating motor, rechargeable battery, induction coil, and switch. A similar coil mounted in the mattress or car seat of the user charges the battery by wireless magnetic coupling.
All components are engineered for longevity.
When the user decides to use it, he simply gives the testicle a quick squeeze, activating the motor and providing pleasant vibrations for himself and a partner.
This idea could also be extended to silicone breast implants.
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wouldn't want to squeeze the wrong one! |
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O.T. I'm sure I read recently that dogs can have prosthetic testicles fitted with ID chips built in. |
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Anno of the month there, at least. |
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Where would you charge the breasts up? |
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The mattress would work for those who don't sleep on their back. Otherwise the induction coils could be built into a bra. It would certainly give new meaning to the underwire. |
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Connect it to your Playstation and make the Hot Coffee patch in San Andreas that much more fun. |
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Quick question: would any guys get a testicle removed to get this? Or is it specifically marketed to guys who were born with/lost one? |
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Have you ever seen a naked 4-year-old
running around win uneven and
disproportionate testicles? |
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If I only had a dime for every time I heard that question.... |
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Other models could be prosthetic testicles with those small bells that are attached to cat collars inside.Prosthetic jingling. |
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Wrong in every possible way, crude, immoral, workable... Hmm, I never really did want kids, and I suppose this would ensure that, with some benefits on the side... so it's settled. Here's my bun. let me know when the production line starts up. |
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Having recent testicular surgery myself, I would not want to go through the (intense, excrutiating) pain just to have one that vibrates. Had the pathology report come back positive, I may have opted for this. [+] |
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I'm sure there are nuts out there (heh
heh) who would pay to have a third
vibrating testicle installed. |
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Nuts are very sensitive! That is why women
can make a man cringe and cover his nuts
just by lifting their leg in a violent and
threatening pose. Remember when that
guy on L.A. confidential was getting his
nuts squeezed by the cop in the bar? The
dude past out. After these life lessons, I
believe that I have normal, sensitive nuts.
I would not like to order an implant. |
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This would be intended for those already missing a testi or two. Most people who opt to remove healthy testicles don't want to be considered men anyway. |
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LEDs would be a great addition. Personally I find it fascinating to hold a small red LED in my palm and examine the glow emanating all the way through my hand. I imagine the relatively thin skin of the scrotum would allow even the higher green and blue wavelengths to pass through. |
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If this were applied to cancer patients, especially breast implants, the tumour could easily be examined with the convenient internal lighting. Other than medical, they would simply be really neat to look at. I'd like a pair of colour changing boobs myself someday. |
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What if it turned on accidentally in a board meeting? Would be awkward as hell trying to turn it off. |
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//providing pleasant vibrations for himself and a partner// |
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What is it exactly that my fella can do with his vibrating taters to provide me with pleasure?! |
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He might be able to make you laugh. |
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//He might be able to make you laugh//
Without a shadow of a doubt. |
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//or mix you a cocktail//
- You want that shaken or stirred?
- Shaken. Definitely shaken. |
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Oh. My. God. I just noticed the summary. + |
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if you installed bluetooth-balls, you could know when you have an incoming call.. |
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ESP balls? That could actually work.
Although, it would be more practical to
put it somewhere else in your body. |
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I can think of several ways it would be pleasurable. It's a matter of preference really. |
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A wireless link could provide all sorts of fun, especially for those into the D/S style. Add a small microcontroller, and complex programming is possible. |
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Are you Benfrost by any chance? |
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what about other vibrating body parts? eg. fingers... one switch makes it a flashlight, the other vibrates it. useful at night, too, while pulling out my balls to find my way would be rather awkward. [+] |
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Depends what you're looking for. |
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No, I'm not Benfrost. I am me and me alone, subject to change. |
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Adding lights to fingers doesn't really work. The scrotum and chest cavity are suited to this because they are large and hollow; plenty of room to stick electronics in there. Fingers tend to be filled with flesh and bone. |
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I suppose you could insert a tiny LED into the fingertip and locate the battery elsewhere, but anyone who's added wiring to a finished house knows how difficult such a task can be. You'd be facing major surgery just to look like E.T., and you wouldn't have the protective silicone bubble either. |
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Now, a woman with a few high intensity implants and a light coloured top would make an excellent beacon. This may or may not be a good thing. |
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Alternatively, just put a washing machine in your underwear. |
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"vibrating taters" is making me snigger a lot. |
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Vibrating nipples is making me quiver a lot. |
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Quick question: would any guys get a testicle removed to get this? |
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Yes. I'm not naming names, but I'm sure someone would. |
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Why wasn't this idea brought to my
attention sooner? |
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//Quick question: would any guys get a testicle removed to get this?// |
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Okay, if I would, just as long as nobody else has access to the remote control, except maybe strippers, and just as long as it doesn't operate on garage door or car-lock remote frequencies, because that would be kind of unexpected. Maybe it would be set off by high voltage power-lines too. Also, it would be tough to get it past the metal detector at the airport with this. |
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..but the resulting search would be fun. |
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