Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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There goes my teleportation concept.

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Pre-wet panties

for fooling whoever reaches up your skirt
  (+3, -13)(+3, -13)
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A generous layer of lube applied to disposable underwear in order to simulate the evidence of intense female sexual excitement. Especially good for spy women who are undercover and must force themselves into compromising situations with unattractive people in order to gain sympathy, get into hotel rooms, etc. Also ideal for completely terrifying middle-school and some high-school boys.
subgenius, Jul 05 2002

Vagina-Jam http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Vagina-Jam
Could we use this? [pottedstu, Jul 05 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       You could always piss yourself. That would scare teenage boys who put their hand up your skirt.
pottedstu, Jul 05 2002
  

       You think I haven't tried that already? I'm shocked and disappointed, pottedstu, shocked and disappointed.
subgenius, Jul 05 2002
  

       Why is anyone, whether they be middle or high school boys, putting their hand up your skirt?
[ sctld ], Jul 05 2002
  

       I hesitate to point out that you can almost certainly buy pre-moistened panties over the internet. In fact I don't think I'll point this out at all.   

       No! Wait! At last we have a practical use for Vagina-Jam. Thank you, subgenius!
pottedstu, Jul 05 2002
  

       Pre-moistened panties are available at any Tom Jones concert.
mighty_cheese, Jul 05 2002
  

       //Also ideal for completely terrifying middle-school and some high-school boys//   

       ---apparently, she likes 'em young.
runforrestrun, Jul 05 2002
  

       Or just get some granny to give you hers, never know if they lost control of the old water factory of not.
barnzenen, Jul 05 2002
  

       93-year old women wearing thongs gets me hot.
thumbwax, Jul 06 2002
  

       Welcome back bliss.
[ sctld ], Jul 06 2002
  

       Don't blame me, Bliss... Blame the Welsh! ;-)
mighty_cheese, Jul 06 2002
  
      
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