h a l f b a k e r yFree set of rusty screwdrivers if you order now.
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I admit it; I like to drive at top speed through puddles for a whooshing fountain of spray and tremendous excitement for passengers.
I propose a suitably sturdy tray containing water, slung between the nearside front and rear wheels.
At the press of a button, the tray is lowered,
the rear wheel connects and the water is released in a most satisfactory whoosh of happiness.
Skill-bonus: un-liked passers-by can be soaked.
How's this for yer puddle?
http://www.youtube....watch?v=fdcKvA5y8v8 [fridge duck, Oct 21 2006]
[link]
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What stops the water from sloshing out of the tray? |
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What is meant by the rear wheel connects? |
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Does the car drive over the tray? |
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So much I don't understand. |
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I agree [texticle]. It made sense until "the rear wheel connects". A better solution would be a hose-pipe attatched to the washer fluid system, which was aimed through the spokes of the front and rear wheels. Something similar to the principle of the 2nd world war fighters machine guns being synchronised to avoid the propellers.
You could have a "soak" button on the dashboard which could do the job... |
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The tray is a portable puddle that lowers onto the road and is then released. The rear wheel drives over it causing the sploosh. The tray is then hauled in, re-slung and re-filled. |
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The tray is, of course, cunningly designed to prevent spillage during normal driving. I expect those clever chaps in the design department will shape it to maximise water volume and minimise bumpiness when the wheel drives over it. |
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If its people you want to spray, take a wrench to your window washing dispense unit. Losen nut, point out ward and have fun. |
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I wish I hadn't mentioned soaking people. |
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my driving instructor was so understanding - we maintained a route that took in all Thames Water's little leaks. |
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whooshh... what is it about driving fast though puddles that gives such joy? |
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Yes, that and the invincible feeling of utterly destroying a puddle. |
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If the rear wheel runs over the tray, why bother haul it in? When the wheel rolls over it, the tray will become a pancake or at least deformed, and therefore unable to be reloaded (no sides to keep in water). Besides, the tray would be dragging on the road at some point so eventually it will get a hole in the bottom where the tray and road meet. |
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Good idea, but seems way to complex for the small excitement you get. |
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//destroying a puddle// what a happy notion. |
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To have another go because puddle driving is inexplicably tremendous fun. |
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Perhaps someone should set up a deliberately pot-holed network of roads with new Perma-Puddle technology (i.e. a hose pipe) to keep those puddles full. I might even pay a few quid to drive round and keep myself and fellow passengers entertained. |
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Lovely idea. I don't know why you'd want to get rid of the bit about soaking people though. It was pretty funny. |
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The bit about soaking people detracts from the splendid sploshing action. |
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[po], your sarcasm is luxurious... Two things we can do as causual agents in this world: create and destroy. Both are quite fun(damental). Of course, any act of creation is also the destruction some other quality, ususally disorder or atrophy. Likewise, any act of destruction can also be viewed as the creation of a destroyed thing. So, to put my statements more in line with 'joy': I love creating destroyed puddles![+] |
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A final note: A puddle is not necessarily destroyed when a car drives over it. It can fill back up. Perhaps, then, the act confers unto man his inability to change the world no matter how hard he tries. This theme is not nearly as enjoyable as wetness or destruction, but it is a small lesson in life that most people subconsciously crave. |
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