h a l f b a k e r yThe mutter of invention.
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Roland poured a glass of chablis for Nancy, placing it on
the bench and reaching for a small bowl of salty snacks.
"Would you like to try my spa?" he offered, expectation
oozing from his voice like sweat from a heavyweight boxer
in the fourteenth round of a world championship bout.
"There's
a spare swimsuit in the bathroom, hanging on a
hook by the shower. It should fit you."
Nancy looked around, confused. The spa must be outside.
In that case, it would be within view of dear, old Mrs
Weinstein, who missed nothing that went on, here at Pay-
Per-View Place. It was probably safe.
She emerged, a minute or so later, clad in a very skimpy
one-piece suit, to find Roland sitting in a spa where there
had previously been a billiard table. A heavy gold chain
glinted in the hair on his soon-to-be-ample chest, wine in
the hand above the water's surface, and the tip of his
tongue protruding pinkly through the gap in his front
teeth.
She looked more closely at the device, seeing how the top
had clamshelled in half, to reveal a hot tub with padded
bolsters on either side. It appeared Roland was naked,
beneath the water...
Lawn pool
http://www.youtube....watch?v=PSgusGf9OTk
A similar example of screwing with a definition to comic effect [oscil8, May 04 2012]
[link]
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A scintillating tale (tittilating, even), but it's not a
Halfbake. It's just one WKTE object/device being used to
conceal another. |
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Show me where someone is selling them. |
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This idea needs less Roland. |
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To be honest, I really don't like Roland. He's an
amalgam of all of the sleazy, gutter-dwelling
bastards I've met in my life, with a broken moral
compass and an unjustifiably inflated sense of self-
worth. He's the sort of guy who rips the silver
lining out of every cloud and sells it to supply his
coke habit. |
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I think we all know someone roughly like him,
though Roland (I gave him the name of someone
whom I detested in childhood) epitomises the
worst of all of those lowlifes we know and hate. |
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Roland I can take. Roland I can understand, even appreciate his motives, if not agree with them. Roland is a sleaze, but he's our sleaze. |
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Jim is festering human waste. |
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We have a mascot. That's what we've been lacking, a
mascot. Roland fits the bill to a T. |
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More like a glove puppet. He'd enjoy that. |
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Some sort of marionette - come - marital aid, perhaps? |
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Yes, I think he'd like that very much. |
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Marionette? Why would he want to marry her? |
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// Show me where someone is selling them. // |
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A spa & pool shop, a high-end furniture store, and an
electric motor & industrial machinery supplier. Somewhere
in the world, I bet we can even find all three in the same
building. |
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Just a technicality, but I'm not a fan of the clamshell
approach. This would cause a seam down the middle
of the table, affecting gameplay. |
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That can be fixed, with enough precision
engineering, [Auto]. |
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//That can be fixed, with enough precision engineering//
Unfortunately, I have a feeling that it is quite hard to precision engineer felt, being non-waterproof and (I am guessing) prone to expansion over time. |
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Synthetic felt is waterproof and lasts longer. |
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If the felt is waterproof, then the playing surface can
simply sink into the tub and the water quickly injected
from a holding tank. The pockets will then double as
massage jets. |
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