h a l f b a k e r yBirth of a Notion.
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On both side of the Atlantic* politicians are having a
bit
of a barney over the Wall/Br*xit.
Seeing as they paid for coming up with solutions -
and
they aren't doing it- I suggest all of them lose one
day's
pay, as an incentive.
The money is never given back,it goes to worthy
charities,
with voters choosing which ones.
* except the South Atlantic.
AskReddit: [Serious] Americans, would you be in support of putting a law in place that government officials, such as senators and the president, go without pay during shutdowns like this while other federal employees do? Why, or why not?
https://www.reddit....u_be_in_support_of/
The people complaining about it being tagged [serious] all thought the top answers would be in favor of such a policy, but the top answers actually explain why such a policy would be bad—it would disproportionately harm less-rich government officials, so the more-rich ones could use it as a threat against them [notexactly, Jan 22 2019]
No fix = no funds
https://www.telegra...sa-mays-leadership/
It puts a solution or it gets the hose [not_morrison_rm, Jan 26 2019]
Government Forfeits
Government_20Forfeits
Words fail my hatred of these fatback grosseros [saker, Feb 07 2019]
[link]
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Could they not just keep the pay, and lose one day of their life instead ? |
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We suggest tomorrow would be good, starting at dawn, so the firing squads can see clearly. |
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I think that the lose a day's pay approach is Tory-
favouring, as my impression (without any research to back
it up) is that a greater number of Tory MPs are
independently wealthy. So, rather than deprive them of
their money, we should deprive them of something that is
equally distributed across MPs: their liberty. Simply
construct an oubliette, capable of accommodating 643
humanoids (Sinn Féin's abstentionist policy gets them a
bye from this). Each hour, throw into the oubliette the
MP with the largest majority - the thinking, such as it is,
being that the larger your majority, the less likely you are
to ever consider compromise or, indeed, reality. Repeat
the process until it's Stephen Gethins, at which point he
can unilaterally do, well, whatever the fuck he wants.
This means that we will have a clear solution to the
current crisis within 26 days, well ahead of the end of
March. Assuming, of course, we can construct an
oubliette in time. |
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Details: the oubliette would be fairly traditional, food
would be lowered daily in a bucket, and they rub the
lotion on their skin or else they get the hose again. MPs
will be let out following implementation of the agreed or
determined course of action. |
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This would work nicely if the oubliette were fashioned from, for example, a disused deep coal mine with all the shaft equipment removed. |
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// food would be lowered daily in a bucket, // |
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We see no objection to this, as long as it's not lowered down close enough for any survivors to reach it. |
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// they rub the lotion on their skin or else they get the hose again. // |
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They are more likely to drink the lotion, but anyway ... tell us more about the hose. |
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// MPs will be let out // |
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... and that's the point where it all goes wrong, of course. Capping the shaft with steel and concrete and then just walking away seems a much better option. |
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An alternative to this is placing the offenders in a nuclear waste repository. The longer they stay, the more dose they get, and the greater the irreversible lifetime risk of a range of unpleasant diseases. Over time, they will become progressively more debilitated and ill. This should encourage a modicum of flexibility in their attitudes. The doors will be re-opened when a unanimous consensus is achieved, and a binding agreement signed by all those present, or at least still capable of holding a writing instrument. |
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As an additional inducement, prior to the doors being slammed, they would be informed that on their release they will have to wait for treatment on trolleys in hospital corridors, like everyone else. |
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In a similar vein, I've long thought that MPs should only be
paid the average wage of the country. That way, less would
want the job for the money and only those who actually give
a crap would become politicians; AND it would give them an
incentive to make things better for everyone (or forcing the
1% to act better & share the wealth to their workers...),
thus raising the average and so their own income. |
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What you'll end up with is politicians financially motivated by corruption and insider trading rather than paychecks. |
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And that differs from the current system exactly how ... ? |
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I think they should have their campaign money
frozen until the government reopens. |
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I see, as if in a vision, the Secret Service so debilitated
by hunger and lack of vitamins, they are unable to
cope with assassins... |
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5 nanoseconds after that, the opposition party stops
blocking federal employees wages. |
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In the UK there is a political party that does nothing as they never take their seats in Parliament, yet they get their full salaries, expenses, offices in London and paid staff costing millions in total. That party is the called Sinn Fein/IRA. It's cheaper to do this, to keep them happy than the alternative of them being terrorists and criminals again - blowing everthing up, robbing banks, dealing drugs etc and or course murdering people en masse as part of their extreme sectarian campaign. |
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Should any of these methods fail to deliver the
desired
results I suggest a process where a politician is chosen
at
random along with a punishment, also chosen at
random
(from a list that I and probably [8th] will soon
compile), and
the two put together on the 15th of each month on
national
TV. |
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Edited: My goodness, wherever did that come from? |
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This place must be bugged, Daily Telegraph today
"Conservative donors refuse to hand over cash in
'disgust' over Theresa May's ..." |
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// This place must be bugged // |
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Well, yes and no ... this is all the product of [Ian Tindale]'s deranged imagination. It's all inside his head ... |
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//Seeing as they paid for coming up with solutions//
See, this is one of the many things that puzzles me about democracy. If electors think that they are looking for someone to solve existing problems, why do they keep voting for people whose only skill is inventing new problems for which a solution must be found? |
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Therefore the problem is clearly the electorate ... |
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Dunno where my previous anno went. Oh well. |
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<rant> I can't stand any politicians of any stripe. By definition they are scum-sucking, hypocritical, corrupt, amoral fuckers who want one thing - power. Give them it, they'll only want more. |
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When that axis of evil, George Dubya & Tony "I'd never get tired of pistol whipping your face into a bloody pulp" Blair, were busy invading Iraq for their nefarious porpoises, I halfbaked this <link>. |
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Slowly boiling them all in vast vats of rat fat is too good for the bastard criminals they all are. And I'm a pacifist. </rant> |
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// Slowly boiling them all in vast vats of rat fat is too good for the bastard criminals they all are. // |
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True ... but it might be something to be getting on with until a better idea turns up. |
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Boiling fat might not be the best thing; it would kill them rather too quickly. May we be permitted to make a case for partially scalding them all in vast vats of rat fat ? That would be extremely unhygienic as well as excruciatingly painful, with a good chance that with a severely compromised dermis they will then contract severe infections resulting in a slow and agonizing death over a period of weeks. |
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Some things are more difficult than they look. |
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I respectfully suggest that you hold back the rat fat vats until you
have tried, at least once, putting yourself through the process of
standing as a candidate for a political party, even at a local level
and in an unwinnable electorate, just to understand the
pressures involved. |
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What was it that Arwen said about mortals? "I used to think
them foolish and wicked, but now I pity them." Not all of them,
obviously. Some of them probably deserve the vats. Others, not
so much. |
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The "others" would no doubt benefit from a brief incarceration in a "re-education" camp. |
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// the process of standing as a candidate for a political party // |
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We have observed said process at uncomfortably close range on more than one occasion. Our conclusion is that it is specifically engineered to winnow out the honest and above all even marginally competent individuals as quickly as possible, then elevating the venal dross to positions of authority. |
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We will admit that it is perhaps not so much the candidates as the system that is fundamentally and irreparably flawed and corrupt, but visiting random pointless suffering on everyone will deter all but the most power-hungry, thus ensuring that when the system collapses and the summary executions commence, those strung up from lamp-posts alongside the lawyers and journalists will be richly deserving of their fate. |
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//"re-education" camp//
Mis-read this as ""re-education" carp". It sounded quite exciting & I was going to ask for more details but then I re-read it & was all disappointed. :( |
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// It sounded quite exciting // |
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It sounds a bit fishy to us. In the fin-al analysis it's probably much the same plaice. |
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//Mis-read this as ""re-education" carp". |
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If you were to look at the Fish Shaving notion.. |
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