h a l f b a k e r yCompound disinterest.
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I, like other health minded individuals,
prefer to give at least a casual glance at
my defecation after eliminating. The
automatic flushers in many public
restrooms do not allow this. By the time I
stand up, my elimination is swirling down
to the sewer leaving me curious about my
bowel
health.
I am proposing a "Please hold my poo"
button located on the flush switch to be
pressed by bowel-curious individuals.
Basically, a pause button for the toilet.
Twenty seconds after the user has stood,
the toilet flushes as usual.
Toiletron
Toiletron [hippo, May 01 2007]
The toilet that knows too much
http://www.twodeco.com/smart-furniture/ hm... [bleh, Oct 01 2007]
[link]
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Good thing it's not a pay toilet - they'd make you insert another coin. |
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It seems that there's a pretty clear
distinction between being health minded
and having a healthy mind. |
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Move to New Zealand; automatically flushing toilets have yet to migrate here. (I've heard rumours of sightings, but even if those tales are true, the Flushettus Automaticus Australis species appear to be shy, elusive creatures, hiding in cubicles trying to avoid being seen.) Our public toilets are the more common Flushettus Handpressus species, quite happy to let you gaze fondly into their festering depths for as long as you wish. |
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Sp: Flushettus automaticus Australis |
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Sp: Flushettus handpressus |
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(can one get <i> italics <i/> here also?) |
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I'd love to, [Imaginality]. Thats actually a
goal of mine. though not for this particular
reason. |
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I appreciate the desire to examine one's 'output'. It can be a good indicator for health. Sadly, in the loos at my work it would appear, all too often, that the person before me is in good enough health to "sink the Bismarck"... |
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Ever seen "V" shaped poop with a hint of
blood from thrombosis? |
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As mentioned poo is a very important
subject for health. In fact there is a
story of a man, I believe a Japanese Spy,
who spent several years in hiding in the
wild. Everyday he very carefully
inspected the consistency of his poo to
regulate his health until the war was
over. Of course he had to allow for
some differentiation as his diet changed
with the seasons, but for the most part,
being doctorless it was his only way to
make sure he was in good health. |
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I have always wondered what he would
do if he discovered something had gone
awry. |
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It could be like an automated photo booth - you wait outside for a photo of your poo to be processed. |
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Why stop there? Have a system that extracts the poo from the pan, analyses it, and produces a full report. |
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Why not attach a video feed inside the
bowl, and you can watch it on a screen
installed on the stall door in front of you.
You can watch yourself wipe too. |
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//It could be like an automated photo booth - you wait outside for a photo of your poo to be processed.// |
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The cleaning staff at the train station want to talk to you, [hippo]. |
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Ahhh... Flushettus automaticus Australis. |
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Had my first encounter with one of these the other day. It apparently thought that me leaning forward to free the end of the bog roll was evidence of my departure from the cubicle. |
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Unpleasant wetness ensued. |
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I vote that Flushettus a.A. be hunted to extinction. |
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Flushettus automaticus americus can easily be fooled. Simply lay a strip of toilet paper across its eyes, and it thinks it's night. |
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There's a strand of salesmanship mising here: poo-examination is not driven solely by medical curiosity. No. There are times when the poo-er can feel, as it exits, the mighty length and girth of his or her stool, finding him or herself connected, by a tower of faeces, to the inland sea of the lavvy bowl. In such circumstances, the passing of an opporunity to examine ones, er, bumdiwork, is a tragedy. Indeed, such is the Ozymandian scale of some works of sphinctral sculpture that a flushing, however reluctant, is an ignominous fate. For such stools, such rare and precious stools, there should be availabe for purchase foot or so long miniature viking pyre ships, replete with oars made from Starbucks coffee stirrers, and masts from creosoted Smarties tubes, so that the pooer can, by whatever means he or she deems to be most appropriate, transfer the stool to the longship, and, with the aid of a can of lighter fluid and a book of matches, set the stool ablaze and set the blaze afloat, to slip over and ultimately through the black night sea, as fond memories crossfade through your mind. |
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[calum] High Score! - see link. |
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Everything about this smells of shit, I
think. |
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[calum] nice sentimental thoughts. But they say a picture lasts longer. Even better, for a small fee, those of us who deliver mighty large poo could image the poo and then transfer that image to a 3D printer to form a nice memento of the accomplishment.
If one were to acquire enough of the 3D poo facsimiles, one could assemble them into a mobile, perhaps painting each one with a bright color.
Then one could enjoy the poos as they slowly swirl in mid-air. |
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Hmmmm, smell that? Smells like a patent ;) |
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Ha! What if the toilette asks you for a favor in return though!? |
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//As if the large blast radius from
chocolate covered dry roasted peanut
fragments and the smell of a large dairy
farm isn't hint enough.
// |
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maybe you should have a look at your
poo, that doesnt sound healthy. |
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//What if the toilette asks you for a
favor in return though!?// |
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After what I've done to it's kin, I'd be
much obliged. |
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It seems that a major item of toilet etiquette has been forgotten, what about the courtesy flush? |
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courtesy flush is definitely still an
option. I think my original idea has
been lost in the anno's This idea is
merely a pause button for automatic
flushing toilets. It is not any sort of poo
keepsake. Its not to revel in the majesty
of your excrement, its to make sure
you're bowels are healthy. It doesn't
need to stay long, just longer than it
takes to stand and turn around. |
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Its also still an option for the toilet to
function as normal, just don't push the
button. Most of those auto-toilets have
a flush button also, so the courtesy
flush is still on the table. |
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//so the courtesy flush is still on the
table.// |
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personally, I don't know if men have as
much a problem as women, but I'd like
this to halt that spray of cold toilet
water up my bum from the anxious
flush. If it analyzed it, better. That saves
me the trouble of looking or figuring
out how to approach the doctor about
my poo. |
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//Why stop there? Have a system that
extracts the poo from the pan, analyses it,
and produces a full report.
// |
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Good idea. And appropriate to your user name. + |
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There are many people up here who don't quite grasp the concept that not all toilets are automatic. Some even go into toilets that haven't been flushed, do their business and STILL don't flush! |
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(+) if the "hold" button is impossible to jam. |
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Whenever I read this title, I imagine a service where gloved men and women are paid to -- urk. |
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