h a l f b a k e r yVeni, vidi, teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini.
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Fabric appears darker when it gets wet. This is never more apparent than during the months of July and August. It gets so hot that even anti-antiperspirant can't save us from fashion disaster. People walk around with dark circles around their underarms. The solution, however, is simple. Make shirts
with lighter colored fabric in the underarms. Thus, when you begin to perspire, the material absorbs that sweat and gets darker. Now your sweaty pits match the rest of your shirt. And only the lady on the crowded bus who has her face inches from your swampy pits knows for sure!
This clothing line will extend to people with more serious problems as well. Back sweat? Butt sweat? Pee pants? NO PROBLEM!!! Never again be embarrassed by unsightly wet spots on your clothing.
Pit Sweat Camo, Butt Sweat Camo, and Pee Pants Camo. From the makers of the bestselling underwear: "Tighty Brownies." Look for them at a department store near you.
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Annotation:
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I walk around with a dark circle at the top of my stomach. But I would have thought the solution was fabric that didn't change color when wet. |
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Anti-antiperspirant? Doesn't that just mean sweat? |
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So instead of a sweat spot, you'll have a sweat ring. There will be the dark color of the clothing, the light color of the 'pit-patch, and the dark color of the wet 'pit-patch. At some point, when the wet spot is large enough, you'll have the dark color of the clothing, the darker color of the wet clothing, and the dark color of the wet 'pit-patch. When the wet spot is small, you'll have a light stripe. When the spot is large, you'll have a dark stripe. Only when the spot is just the right size and shape will you have good camouflage. |
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Here's a suggestion: invent a fabric dye that actually gets lighter when wet, so that the lighening of the dye and the darkening due to wetness cancel each other out. |
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Bone for unworkability in the current state, bun for making me laugh. Overall, [ ] |
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will this work for baldness? |
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[freefall] I'm thinking of rainbow coloured armpits now! Normal,Light, dark, normal? Normal, dark, normal? Normal, normal! |
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