Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Pinworm Containment Mechanism

Textured rotating buttplug
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Pinworms spread by laying their eggs at the entrance of the anus at night, with the resultant irritation causing the carrier to scratch themselves in their sleep. Eggs on the fingers then get spread around the next day as the carrier goes about their business.

Because pinworms are non-symptomatic in adults (apart from a scratchy butt in the night that they may not remember) most people don't take medication to eliminate them.

The spread of infection could be prevented if everyone wore a textured rotating buttplug. If itchy in the night, the wearer could reach down and turn a key-like handle to achieve satisfaction without coming into contact with the eggs thanks to the guard between the handle and the plug itself.

oscil8, May 12 2012

Do not do as I have done. http://wikieducator...es/1/18/Pinworm.jpg
[rcarty, May 13 2012]

[link]






       Amazing. Just truly amazing.
Alterother, May 12 2012
  

       Speechless.
blissmiss, May 13 2012
  

       You might be able to do something with copper, it's a pretty good biocide. For example, a pair of copper foil lined underpants...
not_morrison_rm, May 13 2012
  

       You might be able to do something with copper, it's a pretty good biocide. For example, a pair of copper foil lined underpants...   

       Or alternatively an expanding ray, so it expands them (after they come out) to a point you can beat them to death with a toffee hammer.
not_morrison_rm, May 13 2012
  

       //The spread of infection could be prevented if everyone wore a textured rotating buttplug.//   

       As if anyone needed a reason!
ytk, May 13 2012
  

       I always recommend a plaster, which has also always worked for us.
nineteenthly, May 13 2012
  

       //As if anyone needed a reason!//   

       [marked-for-tagline]... and life lesson.   

       //copper foil lined underpants//   

       If you wore copper foil lined underpants and a tin foil lined hat, would the dissimilar metals generate a voltage and turn you into a kind of human lemon-battery?   

       (I'm desperately trying to think about something other than textured rotating buttplugs, here.)
Wrongfellow, May 13 2012
  

       // Speechless. //   

       More or less speechless than for the pubic silhouette catalogue? That one set the bar for me.
oscil8, May 13 2012
  

       // If you wore copper foil lined underpants and a tin foil lined hat,   

       Probably yes, especially as sweat is likely acidic. Are you perhaps suggesting some bottom-fitted electric fence to zap said worms as they emerge?   

       You could probably arrange something similar with nylon pyjamas and nylon sheets..
not_morrison_rm, May 13 2012
  

       This buttplug... does it oscillate?
UnaBubba, May 15 2012
  

       Is that you, Ben?   

       I used to be of the opinion that all learning has value, but then I clicked, and I want to unlearn it.
RayfordSteele, May 15 2012
  

       // does it oscillate? // Sorry that particular model is for my own personal use
oscil8, May 16 2012
  

       //I used to be of the opinion that all learning has value//   

       How long have /you/ been on the Interwebs?
ytk, May 16 2012
  

       Thinking more on this, orbicular batfish..no sorry, that one just slipped out..containment mechanism..sounds more like a mini-tokomak, what with the magnetic bottle and all.   

       Suspect that having that high-powered a magnet affixed to the nether regions might indeed corral the critters, but play havoc with bird migration...
not_morrison_rm, May 16 2012
  

       I wouldn't suggest discussing this invention at a posh dinner party.   

       You've pictured it, you can't un-picture it.
doctorremulac3, May 16 2012
  

       Make it hollow, with angled holes with a raised lip on the back edge of 'scrape', like a small rotating cheese grater, make the lips smooth and rounded, because you don't want it to 'be' a small rotating cheese grater, eggs and worms will be guided ('scraped?') inside and it can be emptied out somewhere appropriate in the morning, then you'll basically be wearing a small rotating insect trap in your butt.   

       Small battery battery powered zap function optional, zap frequency if set high enough doubles as a small night light for those that want one.
Skewed, Aug 27 2024
  

       This is definitely one of the top Pinworm Containment Mechanism Textured rotating buttplug ideas I've seen in the the last 12 years. In the top ten anyway.
doctorremulac3, Aug 27 2024
  
      
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